Career and family stress
Hey guys, I don't know how to put this but, I've been struggling from alot of things at once. Here it is,
I'm 25 male, born in lower middle class family. We are a family of 6, parents, 2 elder sisters, elder brother, I'm the youngest.
My father is a government employee and always cares about money and making fortune as much as possible. And I hate this attitude of him. I was young maybe 12 when my eldest sister got married, then my 2nd elder sister got married when I was 15. From 10-12 years my sisters are tolerating mental and physical abuse, and all my father can say is my job is done after they got married. I lost the hope from my father that he'll do anything about this. Both my sisters family are money thirsty, and my father didn't gave a single penny after marriage for their daughter sake. My mother is a teacher, she's sick all the time, but instead spending on her meds my father make her work and earn money, he also took her debit card so whenever her salary came he can spend as he see fit.
I turned 22, finished my college and instead work in a private firm made my own business from scratch. I was earning good, had a good reputation in family and my reputation was helping my sisters to stand on ground and I was also helping them financially. I was continuously asking my mother to leave job and come to me but my father didn't let her leave, and till date she's working being sick 😭.
Since I started my business, Everything went well but due to COVID effect and market politics I had to close my business in March 2023. I lost everything in business, and now everything went back like earlier. Ignorant father, sisters being abused, and sick mother working.
I am feeling ashamed as a man, seeing my sisters and mother, it crushes my heart into several pieces.
My elder brother doesn't care about these situations.
After March, as i have to start fresh, i decided to pursue masters. And I'm preparing for CAT exam since March. I want to do masters because it'll give me sometime to think about startup and in the worst case if i couldn't come up with anything, i can start fresh by applying for jobs. But thinking about my family each day is crushing me from inside, since March I'm being traumatized each day thinking about my old sick mother working hard😭. Yet i haven't lost my focus preparation is still going on.
I'm confused. I don't know if I'm doing a mistake preparing for CAT.
Thinking for myself and my career:- masters will be beneficial for me at several levels.
Thinking about my family:- i should leave everything and start working again and start supporting my family.
I am very confused what should I do, I'm crying from inside thinking about my family but career is also important. Can anyone help me here please? Any advice will be helpful.
My father and brother is of no use. So nothing can be done with them. Please help.
@ManojNaikk when all fails, think about yourself first. I know this situation is really hard and I feel so bad for you, your mom and your sisters but they are all unable to save themselves. You will be able to save yourself and then one day when you are on your two feet, you can always be there for others. Otherwise I have seen that all good deeds fail when we fail ourselves. Whatever "thinking about yourself first" means to you, do that. There are a lot of work from home options and internships at home these days so if you are really in need, preparing for CAT and working 2-3 hours on a few days a week is not an issue either. The world is big, options are immense and opportunities are umlimited. Please take care of yourself and I send my regards to your mom, good wishes for your sisters
@navyAcai8433, thanks for your reply. I'll try to implement.
@ManojNaikk
Sometimes we have to take care of ourselves so we can have the ability to care for those around us or those we love.
It sounds like you were doing that, but due to no fault of your own, things have changed. If you find that a master's degree provides more marketability for you and more stability to help you financially, it will maybe take longer than you want to help you mother and sisters like you want, but investing in yourself with your education and furthering your career can open doors that aren't open to you right now.
Perhaps writing out what the benefits and costs are of going to school vs going straight back to work would help you make a good decision for yourself.
@KristenHR, thanks for your reply. I'll try this, i hope this helps.
