I'm scared everything's my fault and I don't know how to fix it
versatileJet3518
December 8th, 2023
I started a new job in a deli in September after working in Galway for the summer after college. I've been getting really anxious and stressed and have panic attacks and theres this one girl I work with who has been leaving me to serve people for hours while she's doing the other jobs, some of which are done in clear view of the line of people. But she complains nonstop about all the work she does, this makes me feel really guilty because I can't help her when I'm serving everyone, or even swap jobs because she never wants to. This has been going on for months
Yesterday she went to the manager to complain that she gets more closing shifts than me and how she's doing the majority of the work. Today, another coworker asked me what's up because I was anxious for some reason and everything just spilled out of my mouth. No one spoke to her all day and were ignoring her and I felt so guilty I couldn't stop crying and had to take so many breaks to pull myself together. And that wasn't fair on all the others
I asked her if she wanted to talk in private later on because she was slamming doors and pots and it was becoming a bit much. I apologised to her for everyone ignoring her and she asked why and what I said to them so I said I told them how I was feeling and how I felt she was blaming me for all this. She said she was only telling me all that because she trusted me and it wasnt meant to be her blaming me even though I felt like it was at the time, but I broke that trust now telling everyone else so she doesn't believe my apology and that Im making her out to be the villain and that I'm obviously the favourite of everyone at work because they all love me and no one likes her. She got a new job in the new year (no start date yet) but said to me she's quitting on Monday because of all this. So now the deli is going to be understaffed at Christmas because I couldn't keep my mouth shut.
I havent stopped getting choked up all day and I feel so much guilt for this, it's making me sick. I don't know how to make this any better or even how to stop this lump in my throat and sick stomach. I have no friends to talk to and my family aren't very good with talks like that. My body is screaming at me to quit the job and not show my face again. I'm a nice person but I don't know why I told my coworker about her. I feel so terrible that I'm the reason she's quitting. Like I'm not a bad person ive never done something bad like that before and now I'm scared I'm gonna get fired or get a warning and everyone's gossiping about me. I don't know how to even make this remotely better. I was shaking speaking to her and had a breakdown when I got home because of stress
toughTiger6481
December 9th, 2023
@versatileJet3518
none of her issues are your fault ... working in customer service she was leaving the hard part dealing with customers for you and only doing the back supportive type tasks. Anyone in your shoes would have felt frustrated and said something... her decision if she does quit is hers alone and again not your fault if shorthanded either.
When you take all items that happen to be caused by you it fills a person with anxiety and stress ,,, you are only in control of you not all others and she is trying tp put blame on you for her issue.... if others were not warm to her it is probably because she had done the same to them leaving the customer service to others and does not sound like a team player.
