I am white-passing

I am multiracial, and I am white-passing.
I realize that this allows me to move through the world being percieved as white until I say otherwise.
I cannot control other's assumptions about me, but the way others percieve me does affect me.

I grew up without my poc father and without connection to his family. I grew up in a white household. I was estranged from his culture and didn't have many facial features from him. I felt entirely disconnected to my heritage, but I was also discouraged by family from exploring it.

I had a lot of shame about who I was and it was best hidden from others by my family that I was mixed. As I grew older, I wanted to learn about myself and about my 'other' family I had never known.

Although I felt guilty for accepting a "mixed" or "poc" title when I didn't look like I was. I felt a strange imposter syndrome and when I walked into poc spaces, I felt like I didn't belong there. I didn't have the shared experiences the rest of them had and I felt no right to intrude on their safe space when I didn't feel *anything* like them. I had no knowledge or connection to my father's culture nor did I deal with the consequences of colorism.

If there are any white-passing poc here, talk about your racial and ethnic identity in conjunction to being white-passing along with your experiences.