Hopeless

so these past couple weeks, I have been super depressed, and anxious as well. I went to an impatient clinic to get help, but it seems that ever since I got discharged things have just gotten so much worse. My support system, my ex girlfriend, decided that the best time to let me know she was happy without me, was the day I got discharged. I just feel like I was tossed to the side. She had promised that she would be there for me to help me through anything, and now she just doesn’t speak to me. I can’t help but blame my depression and anxiety, because I was stressing her out. I can’t help feel like this is how it’s going to always be with friends or family or relationships. And it just feels hopeless. I just feel hopeless. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this bad, and sometimes I do wonder how much nicer it would be if I could just vanish.