Anyone else feel too stupid to function?

@greendayfangirl

You are not stupid at all .

People might seem like they have it all together but we all have our struggles, that's human.

I too only speak one language 😁 lucky at that 😂

@greendayfangirl come on, don't be so hard on yourself. Not everyone needs to speak multiple languages. That's completely okay. Your language seems to be English, what's actually the best possible way the one language thing can go, as most people will be able to understand you. 

If you want to learn another language, I recommend using the app Drops. It's vocabulary based, you have 5 mins free every 10 hours, and learn through games. It worked much better for me then Duolingo, that can be quite overwhelming. If nothing sticks, that's okay too. Treat it just as a game, playing it for the fun of it. 

As for your memory, listen up. There are multiple reasons why your memory isn't stellar, and none of them is one that is solved by hating yourself over it. Maybe it's ADHD. Maybe it's depression. Maybe it's a serious head injury if you had one. Maybe it's all just anxiety. And maybe it's just how your brain naturally works.

For example, if it helps, I have ADHD. My memory sucks. I will not remember why I came in the room or where did the thing I was just holding disappear. I'm significantly face blind and therefore navigate mainly by other attributes like body type, hair colour and length and clothes. I love researching things, but my mind is like a black hole. Information goes in, never to be seen again. Best I can do is very short term memory recall, but my long term memory is very selective about what will it even bother with storing. So I can go to the store with 20 things to buy, no list and buy them all, or creep people out by asking about something they told me 3 years ago, but I will absolutely not recall anything about the documentary I just watched beyond like 2 fun facts on the next day. To remember something long term and be able to actively recall it without someone telling me, I need a lot. And I mean A LOT of repetition with maximum brain engagement, and then something may stick for a while. But that's okay. It makes me a great match to people who love repeating stories or talking about their passion. My boyfriend loves history, and this way, he can tell me about something repeatedly, and each time I recall only hey wasn't that the guy who did (insert something usually completely incorrect here).

Also, I stumble through my words a lot for some reason, that I didn't really do before. I used to hate myself for it, and sometimes still do. But it seems to be be caused by anxiety taking over my cognitive perception, and it's much better when I'm calm. I also used to have a very very bad time in my life, when I had active memory gaps. So its also something you can be experiencing if you have high anxiety, depression, PTSD or high levels of distress. Other factors like exhaustion, not enough sleep, poor nutrition, brain fog, burn out etc can contribute too. What helped me was quitting my highly demanding uni studies and taking a part time job that won't follow me home in a small stationary store. What works for me may not be an option for you, but it may be worth to asses your current stress levels and taking a break for the sake of your body and mind. Maybe it's taking a gap year if you are a student. Maybe it's quitting the stressful job and working at the local flower shop for a year or two until your body resets a little. Maybe it's scheduling time more active rest. I don't know. But think about your causes and options, and see if there is something you can do.

The key is to not push it. Research the things you like, but don't pressure yourself to actually have something stick. Treat it as satisfying your momentary curiosity. Also, find your strength. Maybe you aren't really gifted with long term memory, but short term or interpersonal is good? Or maybe entire memory is down the drain but you can write beautiful poems, make art or fix broken things. Maybe you are great at understanding people and supporting them. In life, you don't really need to have all stats maxed to excel. For example, a mechanic won't need to remember the most important works of literature, or even recognise Mona Lisa. A history teacher doesn't have to know how to fix the tap, or an artist won't need to solve complex math. So take a deep breath. Stop pressuring yourself and take it easy. You are doing a good job 😊

I've had days like that...can't remember worth a damn & nothing seems to go right. What I do is try to remember past successes, & keep going as best I can. So far, better days have always come sooner or later.

I relate so much to. I wish didn’t have a learning disability I could have a higher paying job , and live on my own . I also missed out on so much

@greendayfangirl only being able to speak one language is pretty common for most Americans (sorry for the assumption and if I'm wrong). 

The thing is depending on your age you still may be able to learn a language. People learn in different ways. Your way of learning may not be the typical way people learn. Some people need more visual learning. 

Here is the catch (which is going to make you laugh hard): I am a teacher. I teach English overseas (somewhere in Asia). I've been here for over 20 years and still can't speak the local language fluently.

Finally I end with a joke. I was actually teaching a professor (tutoring) and he told me this joke:

What do you call someone who knows two languages? Bilingual 

What do you call someone who knows one language? American