Entering Depression
I’ve always had anxiety and emotional issues, but it’s only now that I think I am truly experiencing depression. Before, I always had hope and optimism, no matter what happened. Now it’s different. I just don’t know anymore. I don’t trust myself anymore. I feel more and more apart from this world and from normalcy. I’m not sure if I will ever truly be a part of it.
@communicativeBlueberry6793 Hi. I’m sorry you are struggling with depression. It’s hard to stay optimistic these days. This TEDx talk by Dr. David Burns might be helpful.
David Burned is awesome. I have been dealing with depression for over 20 years. My last battle was about 3 months ago and it hit me pretty hard so I decided to see a psychologist for the first time in about 7 years. It helped me a lot. He discussed how anxiety and depression actually work and he also suggested for me to read 2 books. The 10 Best Ever Anxiety Management Techniques and Feeling Good. They discuss not only coping skills but talk about how bc go the brain works in regards to anxiety and depression. I really liked the books and I am still reading them. I am not a huge fitness guy but for the last 5 months or so I take a walk in my hilly neighborhood and I also jog a little bit to get my heart rate up. This helps me tremendously. I usually do it on my lunch break because I work close to home. I am also on an anti depressant which is 20 mg of Lexapro and when I go through my anxiety/depression episodes I will take Klonopin. There is hope and you will be ok. Trust me.
That sounds really tough. Do you want to tell us more?@communicativeBlueberry6793
does anyone know how to deal with disappointing ur parents and hearing them constantly tell u they don’t know who u are and that’s they’re ashamed of u? everyone other than my parents love me and think i’m lovely. she gets compliments ab me from my friends parents and everything but the way i act around my family is completely different than how i treat others.
@communicativeBlueberry6793 Hey blueberry, i'm so sorry to hear that you're experiencing what you think might be depression. have you ever sought professional help? as someone who's also most likely suffering from bpd or depression (or both), i can heavily relate to you when you say you feel so far away from normalcy and a particularly extra distance from people. i totally get how that feels. i've felt that way for a long, longgg time. and i feel ashamed because the only way i've been able to express this is literally on this site and anonymous forums online. but i guess i'm seeing it through a negative lens, when i could also be proud of myself because it takes a lot of courage to say these things no matter to whom or where. i just wish i could've talked to someone about this before i ended up losing everyone i once had in my life. i wish i would've been braver when i was younger and formed a close bond with my doctor or a teacher, but now that just feels so impossible to do. i wish i could have grown up with a healthy mentor who didn't judge me, who i could talk to when i noticed these depressive symptoms appearing and never disappearing. but, it is good to know that i'm not alone and neither are you. no matter what your situation in life may be right now, i do hope the best for you and i applaud you for being so aware of your wellbeing, and for sharing your feelings with others here. i really hope you can find a healthy way to deal with your emotions and depression.
I have felt this way many times. I was always bubbly and I still am but I had been feeling removed from that for years. It’s just now in this moment that I’m reminded of it and I’m like hey, that part of me still exists. It’s just clouded by the darkness some of the emotions I’ve been feeling. That’s ok. I say that to say don’t give up on yourself. You will find that part of you in your own time and in the way that your heart leads you. Sometimes it takes a bit of time to reconnect but the connection is always there. The fact that you are taking the time to write out how you feel and reach out to the community shows that your resilience is active and working. I and so many of us are sending so much love your way right now and we are supporting you in your journey. You are not alone.
