Hello

@nyaaaang Welcome! 💫🤍

I'm really sorry you're going through that. Please know that you're not alone in this, and you truly matter 🤍 This is a safe space for you ❤️ and you can share anything without judgement.

I wish you find the support here, and things start to feel a little lighter 🍀🤍 Sending lots of love your way! ❤️❤️

Struggling with Family, Love, and Being Understood

I come from a family and culture where love is often shown quietly and reservedly. Growing up, affection wasn’t openly expressed, and that shaped how I thought love should look. But over time, I’ve realized love doesn’t have just one way to be shown.

My way of loving is open, affectionate, and genuine. It might seem different from what my family is used to, but that doesn’t make it wrong or inappropriate. For me, loving means being close, touching, and showing care openly it’s how I truly feel in my heart.

It hurts when my way of loving is judged harshly or misunderstood, especially when people excuse far worse things like abuse or harmful relationships in the same family. That double standard feels so unfair, and it’s not my burden to carry alone.

My sister has said things like I have no self-respect, morals, or dignity left because of how I show love, which is really painful to hear. She’s also said that me being affectionate with my partner is considered rude like we’re asking for an intimate threesome — and that if he doesn’t respect’ the family in that way, he doesn’t deserve to be around them.

It feels like showing affection naturally, like a gentle rub on the back, is treated like a crime just because they don’t do those things. I understand we might keep some things private, but sometimes love just comes naturally.

I’ve been careful not to overstep since I know they don’t like it. Now I realize they’re not fond of him, and honestly, I wouldn’t want to bring him somewhere he’s not welcomed.

When I finally speak up for myself, I’m seen as rude or as if ‘he changed me.’ The truth is, I always let them speak to me however they wanted, and when I stand up for myself, I’m considered someone who throws tantrums or is mean.

I’ve realized that sometimes valuing family too much has hurt my mental health more than helped it. I’ve let things slide over the years, and now when I say one thing to defend myself or him, suddenly it’s a concern’ on their end.

Am I wrong for not agreeing with them? If I am, please lead me to the right path?

I’m sharing this here because I need a place to be heard without judgment. I’m not asking for advice or solutions just someone to listen and understand. Thank you for being here with me.