I don't know why I do things.

I have felt lonely and depressed these past few months, I feel lonely even if I know I have unanswered messages, I feel lonely even when my family sees me every day, I feel lonely even when I want to be It.

I've been thinking that I don't have to make sense of things, that sometimes it's okay to just enjoy the little things... But there came a time when that is not enough, now I don't even know why I do that, even when I feel like I'm doing something that makes me happy, there is a void that makes me feel like I'm asleep or something like that.

Right now I don't feel motivated to do what I used to do, and even if I try to do it without motivation, I feel like I'm falling to my knees again, like I just can't give any more.

It's too much weight for me.