I'm a complete mess and I'm so lost.
My depression is crippling me, I just lost my job. The worst part is that I've been lying to my wife about it. I don't know what to do. I'm deep down this rabbit hole and I don't know how to get out of it.
I didn't mean to get fired but my Depression is hitting me harder then it ever has in my life.
I know I have to tell my wife about it, and it's going to be ugly when it finally comes out.
My depression is slowly killing me and I don't know how to stop it. I see a psychiatrist, a psychologist and I'm in a partial program. I take my meds and I'm still crumbling.
I'm tired of putting on the brave face, I'm tired of pretending everything is OK. It's not.
My wife is supportive, but she sees working as priority number 1. I don't , well at least not anymore.
I want to be completely open and honest about my depression with my wife, but I don't think she truly understands what I'm going through at the moment.
My depression , anxiety and PTSD are a perfect storm inside my body right now and I don't like it.
I feel like a prisoner in my own body.
My depression has gotten the best of me to the point that self care has gone by the wayside. I don't even have the motivation to brush my teeth or shower.
I could go on but i feel like this is a good place to stop.
Does anyone have any encouraging words?
@Doughboy00
Hi, I can tell you that I was once in a similar situation and there was no communication between us so it all exploded and ended in multiple tragedies which I'm still in therapy for 20 years later. So I know had I seeked help and gotten the help from my wife than maybe the big big misunderstanding would have never happened!! I just want you to know you are not alone and communication and confronting our fears to communicate and our fears to self advocate!!! I have to get some sleep so goodbye for now. :-)
Blessings, Day
@Doughboy00
Depression is horrible and never a one size fits all situation.... you have / are seeing someone but seems to not be working.... maybe you could try radical honesty ....... not only with your spouse but maybe with employer that you were not yourself when whatever happened that you ended up fired.
i have waves of depression myself lasting months sometimes .... my way out of the hole may not work for you but i look into a mirror and know i cannot rationalize with myself.... i force myself to get up and do the hard stuff... that i would be avoiding .... when i feel i cannot do it instead of pretending ... i am radically honest that i am going through a depression and surprise.......... if others themselves have not gone through it.... they have a loved one who have.... and get more understanding then i deserved.
