Just wanna put this out here
I think I'm having depression. I also have a series of anxiety attacks last year. It doesn't help that my boyfriend is very passive and kind of apathetic. I know he's trying, and i know it's not easy for him to defy his nature. It's just isn't working for me and my mental health. I like fun and adventures. His version of fun is playing computer games and drinking with his friends. I like to have fun under the sun. He hates the sun so much. I like early mornings. He likes to get up late. I looove to read books. He can't bring himself to try reading. The little things is everything to me. He often forgets things and finds it hard to notice my favorites and preferences. We're different in a lot of ways. It's hard. More comprises and adjustments are needed. But i can't leave him. I love him too much to even consider leaving him. Our love is real. But I'm afraid our differences will eventually exhaust us both. No matter what tho, my commitment for him is rock solid. In this life, i only live for him.
@starcotton I'm not great with relationship advice. I've never even dated anyone. So I'm not sure what to say there to comfort you, sorry. However if your experiencing mental health problems then please go talk to a doctor or health professional, hopefully they can help you out ❤❤ gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤ I hope your ok ❤
It sounds like a tough situation to be in. It’s good though that you are recognizing what is going on with your depression and anxiety- don’t ignore it - find ways to address it whether that is therapy or talking to your partner or friends and family - whatever you can do, just try something.
It’s also good that you are recognizing where some of your needs aren’t being met. I understand how it is to be living for someone else, I have done the same thing for many years. The problem I have recently found though is that when the relationship ended, I have been left with nothing - I don’t even know or like myself. Which makes my anxiety and depression so much worse.
It’s okay that you and he have different interests, but finding common ones is important too. Don’t give up things that bring you joy just because they don’t bring him joy. Try to find the heart of what you love about each other and nurture that like your life depends on it.
But it will take equal effort from him too. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and have the deep talks, even if it’s scary or hard to do. He needs to understand what is going on with you, and you’re the best person to explain it to him. And there may be things going on with him that you don’t fully understand yet too. You will regret not being open if you don’t and it’s the only way I think to keep your connection strong in the face of the lies our anxiety and depression can tell us.
Wishing the very best for you 💜
Thank you so much for taking the time to listen and help. I keep on rereading your words because it somehow brought healing in parts of myself i didn't know are in pain. Thank you for reminding me stuffs i used to know but somehow had forgotten along the way.
