Loneliness and its pain
I have been fighting loneliness by trying to convert it into solitude. But i have failed miserably.
I seek now a person to talk to who can understand and talk freely about life.
loneliness is like a flame within the self. It is burning me alive.
if you are interested feel free to message.
We can easily start a thread right here. You don't deserve to be lonely.
Write whatever you want and I will reply once a day.
Do you want to tell me a little more about yourself?@practicalSquare4810
Well, lately I had a pretty tough time doing daily tasks, or general life stuff.
I have tried to understand the problem and what is happening to me. I came to a conclusion that I am suffering from loneliness. As I see, that might not be my only problem such that I am suffering from suicidal thoughts.
i downloaded this app yesterday because the only thing I see now is agony and unnecessary.
I said why not trying to figure out what is wrong by having several point of views. And here I am.
life is becoming a *** day by day.
I know that it is hard right now. You have come to a good place. It is hard for many of us and we all have really rough days where those thoughts can come on occasion.
But you can also build toward feeling a bit better and we can help with that.
What kinds of things do you like to do when you are feeling better? @practicalSquare4810
You might find it surprising but I enjoy doing math. But lately I feel that my mind is ruined by stress and emotional pain.
it is really tough. You know the fight you always fail to win no matter how much effort you put into it.
I really can’t see any meaningful purpose for me to crave. I tried but the only conclusion I came into is that life cannot have its value when you doesn’t have a meaningful relationships.
Us humans tend to seek warmth and love. But when our needs are not met we became mentally ill.
If we don’t know what is the point of all of this ( why we where created or how ), at least we can become less miserable by sharing our concerns.
I have dealt with that existential crisis and to be honest death doesn’t matter to me. I don’t mind blowing my head by a gun.
it is really bad when you don’t believe in a God who take care of you and above all of that you are alone.
the severity of depression is just growing bigger. And that feeling of the inability to move for several hours due to lack of energy is destructive.
I also feel lost. I don’t know how much I could fight this demon inside me.
it is pretty sarcastic with all of those humans and the enormity of the universe one finds him all alone. If eternal *** is waiting me after life that would funny because after all of this suffering and insanity me to I will still suffer even more.
we say hope must always exist but I see it is just causing more and more pain.
I should say that it is a good thing to see a platform like this.
It sounds like you are pretty deep in the hole. I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but there are ways out.
But lots of it is very little steps. You equated not having a relationship with mental illness. That is true in some cases, but the relationship building starts with rebuilding yourself. I don't mean rebuilding yourself for somebody else. I mean actually liking yourself as a person and realizing that you add to the world just the way that you are. The world needs you.
I am pretty sure that probably sounds like nonsense right now. It isn't. You have actually already taken the first step on that rebuild by coming here. There are lots of people here to support you because we have been in your shoes.
Are you talking to anyone therapy wise or taking any medications? Those can really help as well. There are lots of different fronts to attack this from. The one that helped me the most was in that answer to my opening question: things that you liked to do before you got hit with depression. Math is just awesome! I love it as a starting point. You aren't looking at the beginning for long periods of feeling good. You are looking for 5 minute victories. Doing some math might be a way to do that. Do you do any math games?@practicalSquare4810
To be honest sometimes I just suffer tremendous amount of pain and I don’t know why. I really feel that at this moment I don’t have any power left to do anything. The weakness has made me dead.
I really can’t understand why I can’t get out of this hole. Darkness is all I see. And I must say that the flame inside me is just fading because there is nothing to feed on.
Oh man, I just don’t know. It is all confusing. How could I get out? I am losing touch with reality as the pain keep getting deeper.
about therapy. It is pretty complex to explain why I can’t seek therapy since I am not 18 years yet. I will be in few months. And I am not on medications.
I am all ears if you could give me a practical solution to this situation. It is med-term exams period and I don’t want my academic performance to decline. I am not that person who give in easily but I have been in this situation last year but less worse.
First, I was trying to live, but now I am trying to exist.
May I ask how old are? and how could one cease to die?
I really need help with the thoughts, they are eating my alive.
I am a bit older and a college professor so I work with people your age a lot.
I can understand your needing to wait just a bit on the medication and the therapy. You can make it until you get to the point where those become options for you.
It is so easy to get stuck in those thoughts and have only them swirling around your head. For me, getting out involved focusing as much time as I could on the practical. You can slowly retrain your brain.
First, are you eating okay and getting enough water? If you aren't doing those things then all the thoughts get worse.
Second, try to write down (right here is fine) one okay thing that happened each day. It doesn't have to be large. Simply "I had a nice shower" or "I was absorbed in that math problem" is enough. Focus on little moments where you are present rather than stuck in the past or the future. @practicalSquare4810
But to be honest I can’t figure out why do I suffer terribly. I know gratitude and focusing on those small positive points can improve my life. But at the end of the day it is the same result.
I am refusing the idea of killing oneself and I see it illogical but at the same time I can’t understand why do I tend to think that way. The point is that I can’t break through this circle of negativity no matter how much I think. It is not that I hate myself. I actually love myself.
But it is really a weird situation. My mental health is failing me. It all happen suddenilu when you get that pain of loneliness and that feeling of being left behind.
I drink water and I eat normtally. But some days I struggle to get out of bad and eat the breakfast. My sleep schedule is so messed up.
I don’t want to be arrogant about myself. But really, suffering is killing my soul. What do you suggest? I have tried journaling, and I tried figuring out what is wrong but always I end up in the same spot.
I sometimes feel that I could do anything and that it is easy and matter of time. But at the end I never do anything.
Pain is becomming unendurable that I sometimes hang my head to the wall. It is not an action of self-harm but way to find some relief.
do you have any advice? Because I am drowning.
First recognize that is what is happening right now in your brain is bad brain chemicals. You CANNOT entirely control them and they aren't your fault. What is going on around you is not what causes all of your mental illness.
That doesn't mean at all that you can't rebuild those chemicals into something better.
It is good that you are eating and drinking water okay, but without breakfast you are not going to get far. Your brain is telling you during the hardest part of the day that you don't need calories. It is lying. Eat.
Then start experimenting with different activities. It can take trying a bunch of different things to find something that works for you. You should try each one at least a week, probably two. You are looking for little improvements at first, not massive ones.
What have you tried besides journaling?
Also, you didn't post one thing that went okay today. Write down something every day. @practicalSquare4810
I haven’t tried a lot of outside door activities. I tried meditation but I stopped. What is happing is that I know what should I do but suddenly a depressive mood struck me. I don’t really know if it could be caused by chemical imbalance in the brain or some sort of outside influences.
And you know after all of this pain I don’t know how I could see some beauty in life. I don’t understand anymore. What could I do to get out of this misery?
lets say I would start with little improvements. What could those improvements be?
And I experience some sort of conflict inside me. It’s a really weird one. I want to get out of the suffering but at the same time I don’t want to. The only question that happens to be asked: “Why?”.
I know when improving, I must do it for myself. And I know myself is worth that. But at the same time I just want to stay in the suffering. What could that indicate?
I will write one tomorrow.
I appreciate your help. And may I ask you are professed in what? Out of curiosity.
Yes, meditation doesn't work for me at all. I just can't control my thoughts well enough and then I get mad at myself.
It took me a few years to get better at focusing on my actions. Again, it was very much a brain chemical battle. You switch the chemicals by making it a regular practice of just getting outside and walking. That is what I mean by little stuff.
It is also very much why I am asking you to write down one period of 5-15 minutes during each day that was okay. It also rewrites those brain chemicals. Your brain will try to keep you from doing that and give you lots of excuses. If you make it a regular habit and do it anyway then you can change things.
I am actually a historian by training but I work with entering college students mostly. @practicalSquare4810
@practicalSquare4810
Hello, when ever you feel lonely u can chat with me I will listen. U can contact me anytime 
hey there @practicalSquare4810 💙 i’m so proud of you for taking the time to write this forum. opening up and reaching out can be tough 💜 but you did it! so proud of you (:
your right - loneliness is indeed painful and tough ): but honestly, you don’t have to be alone. we’re here (:
i’d be happy to chat with you in this forum space! however, my replies may be a little bit slow (': and i’m very sorry about that 💜
i hope you know that you can always hop into one of the group chats as well, or contact a volunteer listener to talk to here 💙 you don’t have to be alone, friend! 💜
I feel you. I am here for you.
So how are you? Could you do a brief introduction about yourself?
what is your problem?
@practicalSquare4810 gives you a giant festive tiny hug ❤squeezes you tightly ❤ lonliness is a terrible thing 😥 I'm so sorry it's happening to you. We are all here for you ❤❤
Thank you!
Hey… I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through this rough times. I’m glad that you had the strength to write this post and to reach out for help.
How are you feeling today? Have you recently watched anything interesting on any streaming platform?
No. I haven’t actually. Maybe I will watch some later.
@practicalSquare4810
I am so sorry you're feeling lonely :(
I've been there too, it's so so hard. I completely understand your pain. Humans were not created to be alone. God created man that he might have joy :)
I hope I can assist you in feeling a little less alone :) <3
Know that I'm here to talk if you ever need to, and you are never alone, at least not in feeling alone.
(sends virtual hugs) - Ana :) <3
Thank you Ana for your understanding. Sure. Why not.
We can talk from time to time.
@practicalSquare4810 I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with loneliness. Converting it into solitude can be challenging. If you're looking for someone to talk to about life, feel free to reach out. Loneliness can feel like a burning flame within, and talking to someone might help. Don't hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or professionals who can offer understanding and empathy. Remember, reaching out is a sign of strength. Take care, and I hope you find the support you need.
thank you for your support. I appreciate that.