Progressing downwards

@JanusPi

OK, if you think about it, and your life.  If you divided it up into all the good things, the bad things, the embarrassing things, the funny things, the weird things and all the other categories.  Then you just opened the box containing the ‘bad’ things, you might just develop a really skewed view of who you are.  I experienced what you are experiencing with quanta-change methodology.  Like all forms of mental health assistance there is an initial point where all the bad things, in the bad box, have to be looked at, dissected, and shared with someone.  These things are like a flock of pigeons that sit on your shoulder, walk around you, and constantly scratch in the dirt and make ‘cooing’ noises at you.  So there you are sitting in the middle of a flock of pigeons, not just any pigeons though.  These are the broken pigeons, the ones with broken legs and missing feathers, one eye, no tail - you get the idea!

Then all of a sudden someone walks by and the birds all scatter and fly off, you still see them but their detail disappears.  There flight is graceful and coordinated as they circle around and land some distance away.  From here they look amazing, skilled Ariel daredevils.  The broken legs and missing feathers disappear.  I hope you can realize that you are you because of these events, because of the things in the ‘bad box’, it’s just part of the whole thing.  So maybe start looking in the funny box, and the weird box, cause that’s part of it as well.

I hope this helps, I know how crushing it can be to be faced with all the stuff you find horrible and embarrassing and hurtful and shameful.  It can be overwhelming, but it is not the whole thing, the whole story, or in this case the whole pigeon!