Ramble/Anyone relate?

Coping mechanisms seem fun and relaxing from the outside, but i just don’t have the motivation to do anything. I also feel like I’m just chasing feelings that just aren’t there anymore i guess? It sucks and it feels draining despite not putting any energy into anything. Maybe i just need to sleep haha, I don’t know what to do about this urge to get those feelings/memories back, because nothing is the same anymore. I guess that’s the beauty in life.

How stale.

It’s not like I was much better in the past than I am now anyway so I’m not even sure what I’m chasing myself