What to do without friends

I feel like all my friends hate me and I’ve never felt so lonely. i’ve been so paranoid recently and we were at lunch today and this used to be a group of 10 girls. At the start the year I had this thing with one of the girls where I found out she blocked me so I asked her if she was upset with me, but she lied to me and hasn’t talk to me since. But I don’t hate her. I don’t think I ever could used to be close so part of me always is gonna feel guilt. I haven’t talked *** about her to anyone and I wouldn’t. But I know she’s been saying a lot to everyone in the group and it’s ruining my life. She doesn’t even sit with the group at lunch but she’s still trying to bring me down. It’s been worse since I don’t have a best friend anymore. We were so close for six years, but I saw messages of her and the girl who blocked me, talking bad about me and I felt so heartbroken. Our big group is tearing apart and I feel like part of it is all my fault. I feel like they all hate me other than three or four. Today one left to the band room and the other two followed, then the girl who blocked me was already gone, and my two closest friends were absent. It was me and two others. I used to be so close to them and it felt like I was leeching on the entire time, I was following. I felt so embarrassed of myself. I was going to cry. I felt like such in outsider in a group I loved so much. But it’s tearing apart and I have no one else. I just want friends. I can’t be alone.