freaking out
i feel like time is moving extremely fast and i’m literally freaking out because super important things i should be getting done are not being getting done and i just don’t know where to go from here. i need a different approach to everything in my life because otherwise i really feel like a comedically huge piano is going to fall on top of me any minute now.
i have never wanted to just live like a ghost more in my life. even though thats how ive been for a long time now. i want to flee the country and disappear from everyone’s lives. i want people to forget about me and i want to start from zero. i need a clean slate but there’s just no way for that to happen. it’s so hard for me to cope. as soon as i feel okay everything is back to sh**. sorry for all the pity parties, never been to a real party anyway.
i feel like ive been sitting around just waiting until i expire... i just feel so rotten but i also feel like everything around me is rotten, this world is sick (in a really negative way) and idk. i just want to be happy but also, i just want to sit around and wait until my expiration date....