Cant live like this anymore

I am a 20 year old guy and a Junior in College. I live on campus and am suffering severe depression and social anxiety.

I isolate myself, but want to spend time with others.

I never want to do anything, but want things to do.

I have a million responsibilities but always feel bored.

I want to workout, but don't want anyone to look at me at the gym.

I want to eat, but have noone to eat with.

I want to talk to people and hangout with them, but dont want to at all.

I want to do well in school, but have no motivation.

I want to work hard, but cant focus on anything or remmeber anything.

I want friends, but hate myself and am ashamed of myself too much.

I just cannot keep living this way. Shutting myself out. I dont even know who I am at this point. I dont like to do anything or be around anyone so I isolate myself and then get mad because I feel like noone liked me when I know its myself that puts me in that position. I just cant live this way anymore. Someone please help.