Depression Is Ruining Me

Hi @persistentBlackberry29. I'm sad to hear about your depression symptoms. Depression can often make even basic self-care tasks exhausting; understandably, it makes school much more difficult. Coupled with anxiety, worries can be hard to escape and it may bedifficult to relax ? for starters, here's a page with relaxation exercises you can try when feelingtense or shaky.

I'm glad you are reaching out here; you sound like you have a good understanding of what's happening to you,like this is pretty recently affecting your performance, andyou're still in the game!

I know you feel guilty, but this isn't your fault. I hope youget your energy and motivation back soon, and a sense of worth and purpose. May I ask if you know what may have triggered this spiral into depression (if anything ?there doesn't have to be a cause), or what was the first sign you noticed, when?

I understand your parents are angry because they want you to do well in school. I'm sad you believe they wouldn't understand that you're depressed. There is a lot of misunderstanding around depression. What do you know ofyour parents' perspectives on this health issue?I wish that they would understand that getting you the support you need would be the best way to get you back on your feet, personally and inschool.

Have you got a counselor you might see at school to talk with about how you're feeling, to get a sense of your options andperhaps figure out a way to broach this subject with your parents? If not a counselor, how about any other family members or friends who could be supportive to you right now, even just by making your environment a little brighter, or helping you study something that's challenging you?

Regardless, I hope you try your best to bekind to yourself right now, and think about self-care. I know you feel like you're losing motivation ? is there any activity or time that still gives you a spark of joy or hopefulness, even mild pleasure? Any food you still like, or that gives you energy?If so, I hope you give yourself time to enjoy it. Some people find that scheduling healthy, positive activities helps them stay busy andcombat depression.

Also, when you cry, feel things are too difficult or anticipate a negative reaction, have you taken note of your thoughts? Chances are they are negative ? you could think of them as toxic, even? and weighing you down. Something people fighting depressiontry is to challengethose negatives by comparing them to evidence and truths they know ?this is something a listener may be able to help you think through!

There's also a free, private, self-pacedcognitive behavorialtherapy website called MoodGym that I used when I was suffering from depression, that helped me get back on my feet. Please knowyou are not alone;much of the world suffers from depression and anxiety periodically, and they are afflictionswe can overcome.