Feeling Low Again
My first semester of college is almost over. I've managed to make some decent grades and a shitty one, and I feel like a failure. I was in the top 5% of my high school classof 500, what am I doing?
I've made friends, but I feel the reaccuring theme that I'm here for their convenience. For example, the other night my friend was eating alone, so he texted me, and I met him at the cafeteria. Tonight I thought it wouldn't be too bad to do the same, since I was eating alone and knew he could bring great company. I shot him a text, knowing there's a chance he'd be busy. I waited an hour, and he hasn't even cared to read it. He's been doing that a lot lately...he won't read my messages for some reason. I feel like I messed up.
He doesn't even invite me to his dorm anymore. When I'm there, sometimes even when invited, he does this crude joke asking "why are you still here?" I've told him before my anxieties about staying too long or being a bothersome person, and he's started to mess with them.
If he doesn't like talking to me or hanging out with me, why can't he just tell me? I don't want it to drag out to where either our mutual friend tells me or I overhear that he hates me.
I've had such a trouble making friendships, I don't want to screw another one up.
@ollizor
I understand how you feel. It sound like your friend is just using you. I had to dump a friend who was hurting me emotionally and phsyically. I didn't know until so late how much her family hated me. Or how much her family had been talking really bad about me until they became abusive on the phone or in the car. once thought i would be physically assualt by her dad about a preivousl call or i was acused of stalking her.
I feel really low because i can't make my plans works out or i had asked for some advice and was bullied. sometime i feel like i can't get out of bed.
@selfconfidentTangerine1778
I'm so sorry you had such a terrible experience with someone you considered a friend at the time. 😔 I'm also glad you were able to get out of such a toxic relationship! 💙 I can hear that even so, you've still been going through a lot of other difficulties. Please feel free to send me a message if you need. ❤
