Hate
I want to hear from some other people as Im wondering whether this is just me or not.
Im sure Im not the only one who sees coping mechanisms come up when depression is concerned. Websites including 7 Cups are quick to tell you that you need coping mechanisms like these:
- Think of an enjoyable experience
- Do something that calms you down
- Breathe
- Look at a funny picture
- Take a walk
Etcetera. There are tons of examples but these are a few that I see and ones that fit my experience. When I see these responses to my depression, that doing these activities will make me feel better, makes me feel, well, worse.
It makes me feel like a child who has to take 5 minutes out from the activities everyone else is taking part in. It makes me feel like an idiot who has to be distracted with a ooooohh look at the picture of the doggy!. It makes me feel like Im being taught to suck eggs (because I wasnt breathing already?).
There are people who can play a game, lose, and say oh well without need for a deep breathing exercise. Going for a walk is a ridiculous thing to suggest - I cant always just get up and leave where I am to go for a walk. And if I can, the problem doesnt go away anywhere, its still there after the walk.
My question is to those with depression, do you ever see coping mechanisms and just roll your eyes at the idea of them ever being effective?
@FeelinDown No, it's not just you. I agree with you. These are not coping mechanisms, they are avoidance mechanisms. When you suffer from depression, anxiety, or any other kind of mood disorder, avoidance will make it worse. I think you are right to reject advice of this kind.
By the way, if a listener at 7 Cups gives you advice, then it is a good idea to report the listener. Listeners here should not give advice and if you can report any listeners who do give you advice, it helps to reduce the harm caused in the community as a whole.
If a therapist gives you bad advice by suggesting avoidance, then you can report the therapist to whatever organization issued their professional accreditation.
Charlie
AGREE! I definitely roll my eyes at them. Yes they work temporally but people just thoughtlessly post them here and the place is saturated with those kinds of post.
Reflecting, being actively listened to, changing our ways of thinking etc are things that resolve the problem long-term, but i'ts much easier to just tell the person to breathe.
I agree. Ive found that a lot of the ‘coping mechanismsm given tend to be things I feel like Id never remember. In my mind coping mechanism has almost become synonymous with distraction because of the amount of times its been used as such and the amount of times its only actually done that. A coping mechanism has ended up being more like ‘ok what can I do to stop thinking about this rather than solving a problem or getting to the root of it. And seriously, if were panicking, do you really expect us to remember a 7 letter acronym?
