Help?
Is here anyway to make an appointment with a therapist or doctor or really anyone with out my parents permission to see if I have depression. Every time I bring it up to my parents they shoot it down by saying they don't have money or it's a waste of time or I'm just being a brat. I can't remember a time I didn't want to be dead or asleep, I'm just really tired and almost ready to give up. So any help would be appreciated
I need advice. I know I'm suffering from either depression or bipolar. I've known for a while now. The suicidal thoughts are growing worst and worst and I need help. I need a doctor and proper medication but I don't know how to ask my parents. Now my parents aren't closed minded or anything. My mother actually Is the president of NAMI, national alliance on mental illness, in florida. Lots of my family struggle with mental illness. But I don't know how to ask for the doctors appointment. Please help me. I don't want to seem weak or dramaticbut I know I need to.
@Connectingthedots - That sounds really hard, Dots. I'm glad your parents will likely be supportive, but I know it can still be really hard. My mom was supportive, and had actually encouraged me to get counseling before, but actuallytelling her I was having a really bad time andasking for help was incredibly hard. I think there are several ways you can go about doing this. None are easy, but depending on what is a comfortable way for you to express yourself normally, certain ways may be easier than others.
1) Just say it. Next time you are alone with her and have a good amount of time and no one is upset or angry, just blurt it out. "Mom, I think I'm depressed." and if that doesn't open the gates to conversation, maybe add something like "I want to see a counselor" or another sentence that clarifies how you'd like help, or how serious you feel it is.
2) Write it out. I think any letter needs to be supplemented by later face-to-face conversation, BUT writing can be a great way to get it into the open and start the conversation. It might be a writte letter, or an email. You'll probably want to include: what you are feeling (depressed, mood swings, etc) and why you think it's a problem (struggling at school, feeling really unwell for a long time, social relationships hurting, etc) and what you might like to do about it (counseling, her support, or just something to change but you don't know what). A letter can be handed to her and discussed right afterwards, or maybe you'd seek her out later and ask "Have you read it?" or writein the letter "I'd like to talk to you about this tonight." It' probably best to not wait for her to bring it up in the future, just in case the conversation gets dropped. You took all this effort to tell her, you want to make sure something comes from it all!
3) Call her. Sometimes face-to-face conversations is really hard. If you have the excuse of distance, even if it's temporary distance, you might be able to call her sometime when you are calm and when she is likely to have time. You might ask: "Do you have time to talk for a bit? It's important, but not urgent" You don't want anyone to be rushing this conversation. Then you have time to explain what is up and what you'd like to do.
I hope this helps. Talking is never easy - especially not in the beginning. But just getting it out there can be a great way of starting a conversation. I hope things go well with your folks and that you feel able to talk to them soon.
You could even text her: "I want to see a counselor, can we talk about this tonight?" If you think that would help you start conversation later, and help her set aside time to talk in a serious and private manner.
I guess some of the therapist would accept a session with that condition, but they would still need your id thought. I guess you should try it and if they deny you then you should aske them for more details. I'm actually more concerned about the fee because so far i know they charge you for 30-60minutes. Good luck :)
@AlexisTired - It looks like you're a teen, which may make it harder for you to receive help without your parents knowing, but... you can always start the process without them. You said you're struggling with wanting to be dead or asleep, which sounds like suicide ideation to me. Depending on who you reach out to, and what their privacy policy is for teens of your age, they may need to notify your parents. BUT 1) they may not need to, and 2) You will have them on your side when they notify your parents, and if they feel they have to talk to your parents, that means they take you very seriously and are quite invested in getting you support. So, it could actually turn out very well.
Looking for support, there are several things you might do:
1) if you have insurance, go to your doctors and ask what confidential services they can offer you. You can go for a physical and talk to a GP even, to be sure it won't show up on any payments as a psychiatric or counseling visit. You can ask "What is your privacy policy?" "If I tell you I'm not doing well, do you have to tell my parents?" "Do you know any services I could access that would give me mental health support without my parents knowing?" "What are the prices for these services, and is there any way to make them more affordable for me?"
2) You could talk to someone at school about your feelings, and how you want help. They would probably (in most nations) have to talk to your parents because they are mandatory reporters (true in the USA, I cannot speak for every nation), however you could tell them what you are concerned about regarding your parents and ask for more support in talking to your parents as well, and ask "If my parents still think I'm just faking it, how can i get help any ways? I really need support right now." A school counselor may well be able to hook you up with free counseling at school, or free or reduced-cost counseling in the community.
3) You can google counselors/therapists in your area. Many give a free first-time visit, or would be able to help in a free initial phone call. You could say: "It's probably too expensive for me to come to you right now, but I am looking for someone to talk to. I'm feeling really depressed and don't know what to do. Do you know any confidential, and low-cost, or free counseling I could go to?" They might be able to offer you that service themselves, or they might know who else in the community can.
Those are my first guesses on what might work for you regarding finding counseling. I know it can be incredibly hard to work around parents as a teen, looking for counseling and trying to do finances without them, AND avoid them being told. The good news is, the older of a teen you are, the more likely you will find completely confidential counseling options
(for me, confidential counseling was certainly available by 16, and somewhat available by 13, but... do ask questions! They are required to tell you what their policy is, and very willing to help you understand it fully. Hypothetical questions are also a good idea at times, ask if you can ask hypotheticals like "If I were to say ___ or ___ what would you have to do?)
I wish you the best of luck in finding help Alexis. I am really glad to hear you are wanting to reach out for support right now.
