How does anyone else rationalise things when it seems like the end of the world?
This is the first time in months I've been on here !
On the surface, a big part of why I'm depressed is because I've not got a job. I did have a temporary short term job months after I graduated from university. A job would be a transformation for me in many ways, more money which I need, and I don't want to have to repeatedly take money of my mum even though she doesn't mind. But what it would allow me to do is permanently leave home and get a job back up north, where I went to university. What I miss so much from my uni days is/are regularish human contact. The only people I see and speak to are my family who live with me, and my grandma. All my uni friends are back in their own parts of the country, and I really want a social life again. I would also love to start dating again, which I was able to do at uni, I'd love to begin to settle down with my own life, but it's hard!
I was on sertraline 200mg for several months, but I honestly didn't feel any better and so I didn't go back to the doctor to ask for more.
I'm applying for administration assistant jobs and similar, just so I can build up my experience so I've got more going for me when I apply for civil service & similar jobs that I'd like to do. I know I will get a job, but the wait is excruciating and I can't stand it. I mean, I've got a certain level of voluntary work experience, from my local authority, my local Member of Parliament when I worked in his office. And I've now got a degree in politics and sociology - so hopefully it happens and soon!
Apologies for the very lengthy post!
@Simon22UK
Me too. I've been out of job for 6 months. Loss income aside, everyday feels like solitary confinement to me. I have nightmares and when I wake up in the morning, I realise that's when the true nightmare starts. My heart rate is elevated and I just don't know how to go through the day. I just sit in my little room with no one to talk to. As if I'm already dead
Few things that somewhat alleviate the torture which perhaps could be helpful to you too.
1) Breathing exercise in the morning to drop the heart rate
2) Walk far under the sun to get my lunch and dinner so as to feel normal
3) Exercise once or twice a week just to sweat it out
4) Speak to my dad via video chat every night
5) Chat with others on 7cup
6) Read as much as possible about Depression and treat it as an illness. Take Depression seriously
What didn't work for me are those that are not repeatable daily e.g. going out with friends.
However, at the end of the day, it still feels like staring into the Abyss. With each passing month, the hole seems a little bit deeper.
