I don't know how I can trust ever again
My closest friend turned her back on me. We were like friends with benefits but we both had strong feelings for each other (or so I thought) and the only reason we weren't in a relationship was because she didn't want to do long distance. And until recently us being closer together wasn't a real possibility. But we'd talk everyday, we'd tell each other about ours days, we'd call several times a day and every night before we sleep. One day about 3-4 weeks ago she told me that he was messing with her, like playing little practical jokes on her. I knew then that he liked her and that worried me but I wasn't her boyfriend so I couldn't really say anything about it. Then starting new years, she started acting like she didn't care about me anymore: texting me take dry and without much emotion, she barely called me and when we did call it was only at night when she was rushing to go to sleep. I confronted her about how she was treating me and she said that she was just confused about our relationship, like we were more then friends but but not bf/gf and she was tired of having to be on her phone all the time to talk to me and she was tired of the distance between us. That hurt me to the core because she had always talked to me about everything and she kept how she was feeling from me. And she said she didn't tell me about how she felt because she knew I was going through my own stuff personally, but that has never stopped her from talking to me about anything before. So a day later I messaged her best friend and found out that she started talking to a guy from her job and their first date was on new years. I was going to confront her about what her best friend told me but before I did, I asked her to be honest with me about why she started treating me different. And she lied to me multiple times. Then I told her I knew about the guy and I knew that she had lied to me about what she had been doing on those days where she was barely talking to me anymore. She told me that she didn't tell me because she didn't want me to stop talking to her. And on top of all that no matter how much she said she's sorry she still told me that she just wants to date other people even tho I had been seriously thinking about moving to where she lives so I could be with her. And at this point, I'm so hurt and broken and lonely. I trusted her more than anyone else in the world and she basically threw me away for a guy that she knew for a couple months and she's known me for almost 4 years. I don't know how to stop thinking about her and what she did, I don't know how to pick up the pieces. I don't know how to move on from being betrayed by someone so close to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated because I'm tired of being tortured by my thoughts
@LonelyRaven72
long distance is tough and while it works for some sooner or later it does seem harder .....
a person there that she can touch and see eye to eye is different no matter the phone calls and such ....... with the relationship undefined and not knowing if and when you will be in same spot someone else could come along .........
i am sure she was going through lots of thought but should have been upfront about it and not lied ..... thinking about moving and doing it are two different things and maybe you should have been more upfront about your feelings and your plan for future......
it seems so many afraid to put themselves out there afraid to be hurt call something casual or friends with benefits etc and this type of scenario happens ........ and you are hurt and it did not feel as casual as you thought ..... people cannot protect their feelings by either downplaying them or calling it something else.......
tell her how you really feel talk about what are realistic plans of being in same area or relationship even if she chooses the other route you know you told her.......most regret is things not spoken or things hidden.
