I feel depressed and lonely

This years just has been so bad, I'm descovering myself, my personality, my goals, and my depression.

And this is quite weird and bad, I just can't feel any emotions, I can't even cry to let them go away, I just can't, everyday I have to deal with that feeling and when I get home, it gets worse, and I mean, I don't have familiar issues, not even with my classmates, but at home my bad feelings get higher.

Sometimes I think, "well, I don't wanna make myself disappear", you know what it means, but what does it matter if I feel like a piece of trash?

I said, this will be my year, but now, I notice it won't, and maybe none will be.

I'd like to introduce myself to other people, you know, to be social, but I try and I can't, I don't feel comfortable when I go to parties and no one texts me like, not even my friends, so my chat is also empty and increases that lonely-mood.

These two days I still have been feeling the same fricking mood, a kind of sadness-loneliness that is destroying my mind everyday, I just don't know waht to do, I feel less and non-important.