I feel like I am going to loose my kids

So my ex-husband mentioned today that if I don't wake up and clean the house he is going to think about taking our kids away from me.

See my house is a mess. There are always dirty dishes, dirty laundry, and papers everywhere. Just a big mess. Are the kids healthy? Yes. Are they safe? Yes. Loved? Yes. But he makes more money than me. Has a much cleaner home. I can't say if he files for custody if he will win or not but I am sure that my depression and anxiety isn't going to help me keep them. I can't live with out my kids. I hate my weekends when they are with him. It's only every other weekend but I hate it. I need my kids. I don't know what I am going to do if he takes them away from me.

I'm just so upset right now. I don't know what to do. I just can't loose them. He keeps telling me just get up off your butt and clean the house. He just doesn't understand. It's not that easy. He just doesn't get it. I want to clean up but I can't I don't know how to get up and do it. I may get up for a little bit but it never lasts long.

Ok vent over. I'm still upset but vent is over for now.