I have no one talk to. Called my father wanted to tell how worst my life has became couldn't utter a single word in peer pressure.

I want to go home and i want to hug my father and cry. But I don't want to go with a failure face. I called him to tell how worst my life has became but couldn't utter a single word. I don't have that fucking bond with my father to tell him. I am so fucking introvert I couldn't make a friend with whom I can share it all. Now closest person think I have became Libialty for them. I have locked my self in my apartment from last 4 days. Whenever my heads start hurtings i bang my head on the wall for a minute and Its stop hurting. I checked my contact I have no one to talk. I am this chutiya that I even cheated with my girlfriend. And I have no one expect my guilt. I don't what is going on with me.