I want to run away

I hate my family so much. but like, they never did anything wrong. I just hate my mom's voice and her telling me over and over again that we don't have money for anything and her trying to help but making to so much worse. and I hate my pets. I have two snakes ans two geckos like idek how it happened and it's so overwhelming and I want them out of my life. i hate crying in my room and writing in my stupid diary app. I hate my friend. she never did anything wrong. shes so perfect and nice but I feel tired of her. it's the same thing that happened with my last friend, I feel so evil.

I don't wanna stay here living with my mom. I hate my room and everything about this house. I hate her. and I hate myself for hating her. I just want to like pack my bags and..

it wouldnt work I'm too scared. I don't have any money. I'm too young to just of off on my own. I just wanna feel loved and I want someone to tell me they really really love me and want me to be happy. I don't wanna go back to school, I can't. but I can't do anything else I'm just so messed up and I wanna start over. but I can't. and I hate it.