Livin' La Vida Loca

IDK where to start with the madness, so I'll just start from a recentish issue, and just flow. I'll put the different sides in [], to try to make things easier to type.

I married my wife, and we have an awesome boy, whose note quite 1. However, instead of joyful, I'm often angry, and resentful. I not only feel this way to my wife [W], but my son [S}. I find it disturbing, upsetting, and frusturating to have these feelings for her, and especially him.

The root of the issues, IMO, come from my wife's mom's [WM] side of the family, and her dad's [WD] side. When they got married, besides the majority of families being in 2 different states [WMS; WDS], with another state between them, there is a HUGE fight over religion. WM's side, while not directly affiliated with them, are 7th Day keepers. WD's side is atheist, and very secular. Both WM's and WD's family didn't want them to marry, and have been very negative towards the "other side." Here is the most recent crisis, which seems to be something new(ish).

Back in Sept, there was a stat rape incident, involving a 13 year girl, and a guy who was +10 years older than her. The girl has issues, including coping with a bro who died in 2009. The guy has some mental learning and comprehension issues. The issue is that the guy attends the small church that WM's paretns are pastors of. WD's family accused WM's family of promoting this sort of behavior. They included my wife & I. We've been married for 1 1/2 years, and she was over 18, by almost a year. However, I'm more than 10 years older than her, which WD's side didn't approve of. My wife's older sister did likewise, in that after she was 18, she married a guy who was +10 years older.

That we were brought up in police reports for the stat rape infuriated me, and terrified my wife. Due to some underhanded antics by WD and WD's family, their remaining minor kids were taken from their home, across state lines, to WD's family, nevermind the ongoing investigation. How this was accomplished was WD lied to CPS. It's the involvement of CPS that got us both, for if they were looking in on WD and WM, will they look in on us? Of course, 2 points are to be made. 1) We have been married 1.5 years, and there was no reports, whatsoever. 2) WD's side has made several insinuations about the church--and its members--are cultists, promoting sex trafficking. Since that's being slowly proven in court to be false, it opens WD's side to possible criminal and civil court actions.

Where things are also stressful is that we are currently staying with WM's folks, and live up in the mountains, about 45 mins north of town; more time, with the winter weather. That's because I've been working temp/freelancer jobs, and am currently between jobs. At 1st, I was glad for the place, especially with the baby on the way. However, that's been a nest of vipers. For example, I was looking to get a "job" working Kirby vaccuums, which I'll let people do their own research on. The issue was that I needed to be in, on a Saturday, for training. This wasn't mentioned when I started. WM's folks, being pastors of their tiny church, told me that if I work on the Sabbath, I'd have 30 days, and then have to leave. They believe that if I don't keep the Sabbath, it somehow taints them, as I'm "in their gates." ATM, I don't have resources for anywhere else. As for "shelters:" they want to split us up; we would have to be involved in heavy church activities that go against our beliefs; they would limit us to contacts; and a lot of other rules, that are either stifeling, or insulting.

In addition, they have no consideration for others. They are constantly telling us to be quiet, when the grandma needs to sleep, but they tend to stay up late [sometimes as late as 1am], and then, gramps gets up at 6am. Add to that, we have a baby that wakes up at random times to cry for feedings/diapers, and sleep's erratic, at best. I, sadly, am a very light sleeper. Just walking along the wood floor can often wake me up. And for whatever insane reason, granny claims she needs "white noise" to sleep, and that "music" plays loudly, more often than not. I've mentioned all of this, and for a bit, they do so, but then, it goes back. Or, they refuse to, with granny saying "I need this to sleep;" yet she complains about us making noise???

It also becomes irritating, with constant badgering about my currently not being employed. Granny constantly suggests all these customer service jobs, which I simply hate. Even if I didn't, when you add in the very time it takes to commute, with the gas, and the partly pay, I'd be spending most of my money on gas, and not being able to leave. It would also take away time from looking for jobs that I'd like, AND that would pay well. Of course, the problems with them not respecting a sleep schedule is a problem, too. I've found myself being tired. A few times, I tried to sleep in the living room, on a sofa. However, they crank up the fire to +95, and any attempts to make it a little cooler are crushed...I had gotten sick, because of the rapid changes between the heat and cold. That also makes a job search dismal, as I'm either tired, or feeling ill.

One last crazy issue, for now, that weighs in. WD's dad isn't with the rest of WD's dad. At one point, he got very threatening, making a threat on my life. The only remedy I'll list here is a restraining order.

So, with all this insanity, it causes me to often question. Should I have married my wife? She has a very "mountaineer" outlook on things, while I've a "big city." She wants to keep ties with family, even though they do everything from use CPS as an excuse to take kids across state lines, to death threats. For me, family is on deeds. I've friends I've know for years, who are more family to me, than my own family. I'm not so keen on ties to most of the people mentioned in this thread, which is another huge stress with my wife and I.

Anyone have their $0.02?