One thing I feel sad about right now is....
The one thing that I feel sad about right now is I may be too damaged now to get any kind of help or I am have always been too damaged to get any kind of help. I think that is why I am lable as crazy.
@selfconfidentTangerine1778
I feel like I will never be happy. I can't get happy.
@selfconfidentTangerine1778
Embrace your craziness. You don't need any help! Why? Because you have the strengths to do it yourself. You just have to start focusing on that. What can you do to feel good? Diet/Fitness/Career/Volunteers. Find a place you feel good and go to it. If not create it.
You've got this!
Be warned, guys. This is lenghty.
I feel like everyone in the Group Support Rooms I frequent grow more and more tired of me each time I show my face.
I remember when people helped me feel included in conversation, now most of my words are ignored and the conversation just goes on without me being present.
I feel like it's because I have nothing of value to offer.
I sense people growing tired of me.
Even when I search for advice some people make obnoxious comments like "oh, go to college early. You love your tutor, lol."
I was feeling scared to leave the house so soon. I like being outside when I know everyone else is inside. Even if I did leave early, most of the chavs from college will still be hanging around town and I don't want to bump into them. The Ofsted Inspector came round today, so the tutor needed everyone to be on time. These people were mocking me. I feel so angry and hateful towards them and myself.
All of them were brushing me aside. Just like most people do. I swear I bring an odd "vibe" to the group, one that doesn't reflect who I am, and people pay attention to IT instead of looking at me. I'm not there. This outshell is, created from my insecurities of what a "man" is supposed to be. I'm very soft, and force myself to toughen up. Whenever I toughen up it feels fake, it feels wrong, I'm appreciative of my emotions. Yet I fear people are molding me into a box. People treat me as if I'm supposed to be a tough guy. I put on a "fake self". I hate my "fake self" as everyone sees it.
I'm trans. I'm on male hormones next year. I'm scared of my femininity being dissolved further. I'm scared of being frowned upon for being soft.
@sparklyseaweed 😔 ❤❤
@sparklyseaweed I hear you❤️ It is so difficult to break away from the isolation but thats exactly what we need to do. I say it and struggle doing it, but baby steps do work 💪🏼 keep the dream of your beautiful uniqueness alive . We need more people like you
@sparklyseaweed
I feel this way all the time people treated me horrible in the chat. I was once able to get some advice and then suddenly I was mobbed and bullying one of the chat in another support group had me banned and made accusation that was false. Or they went some where else what I had though was a joke that was harsh had turn into some hostility and I was mobbed again by someone who was the last person I had talk to before I found out I was mobbed who insisted that I had told her she had me banned or she had hacked into my e-mail account. Or someone had told her that what I was telling everyone about. All because I am straight and my faith. I didn't until severeal month later I was banned didn't know why because said anything. Another monitor yelled at me for trying to make him his personal therapist. Made rude comment about me studying psychology all because he is bioplo and the other i had thought was my friend who had became rude because i had admitted that I had survived attempted sexual assualt. Who had got mad because I had block when she I need to face my problem own up that I had lied to her about what she hadn't done to me or what I never experience. Then contact me in a chat and start cussing me out because she want to work it out after she cuss me after month later i tried to resolve the problem and she cuss me out agains when she started conversation that she knew she didn't want to talk about and wait so long to tell me and by that time I had apology and drop the subject and she did it again. When I confront her again she made sure that target me again. So I stop talking to her. I am thing about blocking her again.
The fact that my hairs falling out and I don
That I
I learnt that my parents got financial help from the person who molested me. I feel empty.
Realising that Ive been used for most of this year!!
To know that not only had I alienated the best friends I ever have, and not only did I piss off the only girl I have ever loved to the point that she now completely ignores me, but this whole time, I have been making people backstab me, I have been scaring everybody off. I have been ruining my whole life.
To know that my hopes and dreams are now all but completely shattered, to know that my hobbies and interests now don't entertain me, and no matter how hard I try, no hobbies take their place.
To know that life will get harder, I will grow old, frail, alone, and likely die with no legacy and the only people who will remember me hate my guts.
I
That I can't be with the only man I have ever loved. He's my best friend and I'm so in love with him but he has decided to just be friends. I miss the intimacy with him and the closeness. I just can't believe I won't get to marry my best friend; the only man I've ever loved. I feel like all of my dreams and plans have been shattered. I just can't imagine my future without him as my own. I keep imagining him finding someone else and hating her for having the privilege of kissing his lips and having a family with him. It makes me ache deeply and I get physically ill. I'm just so dissapointed and heartbroken.
@Lsb2413
My heart hurts reading this. Ive been there, sunshine. Youll eventually find some peace, but for now, you probably wont feel much but the raw emotion. Try not to let yourself sink too far into that pit. Its so hard to climb out of and the sides are slippery. Just remember that this, too, shall pass. The pain will ebb eventually. I promise you will find your footing again.
Think back to yesterday. Maybe the day before. You were at work dealing with something the boss asked you to do. Are you still doing it? Still immersed in the task? Ill bet you had to think back on it and try and remember what it was you were working on. There will come a day that you will look back and have to think about what had you so upset today.
Dont get me wrong, Im not minimizing your pain. Not by a long shot. But I pray I can give you a little hope that as much as you are hurting right now, life has a way of moving you forward through your pain and into a place where you can finally deal with it and start taking an active part in your own life again. Happier, healthier, and with a little more experience behind you.
YOU deserve someone who puts YOU first. ...until that person comes along...put yourself first for a while. Youre worth it.
I feel sad because I am left out of things, or i was accused of things that had I didn't do.
