They Go Away...
Why does it always seem like, when you have someone you feel like you can comfortably talk to, explain how you're feeling; so you unleash. You describe down to almost every detail as to how you're feeling and why you think you're feeling this way. You explain to them you're sorry, you don't want them to go, and you have faith they'll be there for you. But, in the end, they all go away. Why? If it was my friend, I would have my phone ringer on loud at all times if they ever needed me. It feels like people are ignorant to depression, and they don't understand nor do they want to understand. I get it, it's dark. It's negative, nobody wants to be around that. But there are people down here with me, and me, who are theoretically reaching up waiting for someone to grab our hands and help us. I know it's up to us to get ourselves out of these situations, but when you feel like how I do, you don't have much hope. 
@reservedNectarine2127
sorry that happen to you . it is disappointing to see your close friends disappear from your life . depression affect everything not all people can handle that . it si make you more depending . need to support . maby not perfect friend so you can imagine who can stand by with you
but the good thing is you can learn some idias make your social lif better
hug
@delightfulUnicorn38
Thank you. :)
@reservedNectarine2127
I don't know how old you are, but I am 33 and know by now that friends are far and few after we "grow up". That in itself can cause depression. After I graduated high school, some friends stayed around while we went to college. We partied and had fun together while experiencing the new chapter in our expanding towards "adulthood" life. After everyone got a few years in college or a tech school, figured things out w/a career, we started separating and the party life became old. Some wanted kids and a family. Some wanted their own business. And some wanted to move out of state. It really sucks, but it's life. Only people I have to talk to is my husband and my mother. You can find a friend or a significant other if you don't have one yet. Sometimes telling a person too much all at once can scare them also. I hope you find a person to talk to and figure out what is bothering you. Depression is not a fun part of life. We can work this out. :)
@TransAm85
Thank you for your reply, I am 26 years old and married. I was working full time but have been put on stress leave due to chronic panic attacks, my husband is a crane operator and does not want me returning to work until I'm ready and have my mental health all sorted out. I appreciate his offer to support me, but I feel like I've lost my independence by not having an income and it is very hard to deal with. I have depression, and have had depression for most of my life. As well as anxiety, but the extent that my anxiety is at now is all very new to me. I am on medication and seeing a psychiatrist once every two weeks and doing group therapy once a week. I just recently reached out to online therapy as I am not comfortable talking on the phone, my first attempt was a bust until I found 7 cups. I just needed some way to release, to vent. To get advice, and not to be judged. I know how frustrating this is for myself and for others.
@reservedNectarine2127
First of all, you're very lucky that your husband stands by you. I understand what you are saying. My husband has a severe anxiety and depression problem, but chooses to medicate himself w/alcohol instead of talking to anyone. I think you are doing the best you can. All of this stuff roots from something though. I have a severe co dependant problem that roots from my childhood and now at 33, I am developing some social anxiety also. Why? I used to be that chubby kid in school. I'm no longer the chubby girl, but all that teasing and constant worrying of being teased is still in my head. We have to find the root of the problem and conquer that. Try thinking about what may have caused your depression and anxiety? Phones .. I don't really like that either. I was in my late teens when texting started lol. We stopped talking on our cell phones when texting came out, so now I get anxious having a phone convo sometimes! lol I totally understand you.