You can rant here
I know how it feels sometimes when you just want to rant, but don't know who to talk too or even if they will care. Well I care. You're not alone! Please feel free to say whats been on your mind lately, if you want someone to talk too or just want to rant away. I will listen.
I think parents need to try their hardest to protect their kids mental health. I'm still trying get over what I went through as a child and I'm 29 with a 9 y/o. It has damaged me beyond belief and I try my hardest to appear normal.
I have many rants i want to say but will focus on 7 cups Very frustrating that have to pay to chat to therapists on here why cant people who run this site pay them what i dislike most on here my theory is that might all be scam and the therapists are not real people just bots like noni hope my theory is wrong i am sure this rant has been said a thousand times unfair i wish it was free :(
I feel powerless and alone most of the time. My moods swing around so fast it is exhausting and I really just hate my body for not being able to balance things out and stop me from feeling this way. I hate that I am too weak and underacheving that I can't stop smoking marijuana, and in turn seem to spiral deeper into depression every year. My mood is on a hair trigger that goes off if a family member even looks at me wrong or does anything that I percieve as 'rude' or 'against me'. I feel crazy and I know most of my actions are abnormal yet I do nothing to stop and I am so angry at myself for it. I get so angry at myself and at others, and every time I do, I feel myself needing to lash out either at myself or the objects around me.
I feel sucked into this cycle of pure rage, really deep sadness, and occasional moments of confidence or calm, before they are broken suddenly by tiny, inconsequential events that I react hugely to and the cycle continues. It feels like nothing will change, and I cannot imagine my life or my perception of events, myself, and others to be any different, nor can I picture this constant simmering rage to go away anytime soon. I'm a young woman, so no one really expects blunt rudeness or pure anger from me, and when that's what they recieve, they are surprised, which fuels my anger even more. There probably isn't anything that I could not get mad at now, I lose count every day of how often I wind up and then collapse again, either into a crying fit, or a numb haze of weed.
Do you ever feel like... you had this image of life in your head and how it would be and how things would feel when you finally get there and then when you get there in reality you're just really disappointed?
I don't know if it's cause my family life has been, and still is, a bit off and I worry it's affecting my view on life. I don't know if it's extremely childish to feel this way but I always thought things would feel alot more... like mystical or something. Like if you had a sibling or something it would be like this amazing feeling of "Oh my God! I have a sibling! We're related! This is amazing!" but with most people I've met it's like "Oh we're related... Whatever." Or feeling loved by your family would be this amazing thing but it's just sort of like you're just there and nobody really cares about that, they just want to get on with life and you just happen to exist.
And I don't know if it's because my family life is screwed up, or because most of the people I've met have been just as screwed up as we are or if it s a stupid thing to say that these things would have some amazing emotions behind them but all I know is I don't want to feel this way. I want to feel amazing things and be happy and I don't know where to begin. I want to feel loved and worth something to somebody and I just don't know how.
@PluckyLuck248
It is interesting how some of us imagine life and the world to be this incredible magical experience only to sometimes find that our imagination was not fully satisfied in the end.
Heres the thing, as dreamers (especially very creative minds), we have to understand that life IS this magical thing despite what we might think sometimes. I see it sort of like the way that I see movies. If I go into a movie expecting certain scenes to play out in a certain way, Im essentially setting myself up for dissapoinent no matter what happens.
Its okay to imagine and speculate as its part of the fun, but once I step into the theater, all of those thoughts go away as I let the film surprise me with what it has to offer. I tend to enjoy films better that way. Let the filmmakers take me on the journey that they had scripted out for me.
As is life. Its great that we envision incredible things to come, but we should also take time to step out of our created version of the world and see it for what it is. It IS beautiful, it IS magical, it IS something special. Question is: Are we opening our eyes enough to see it?
Just try to remember to keep a healthy balance between expectations and reality. Have enough space for both to exist and I think youll be fine.
Im sorry,
Im sorry I cant be the big sister you need. Im sorry my own problems are so heavy you have to bear them to. Im sorry I cant be someone to look up to or to aspire to be when you grow. But all I can say is sorry. Im sorry our parents prefer alcohol then our feelings. Im sorry our mother cant relies how we feel. Im sorry. Im so sorry I dont have to straight to keep going. Im sorry my mind is telling me to give up, and that its nothing but a blank canvas. Im sorry I cant be a shoulder to cry on because Im crying myself. Im sorry. Im so very sorry.
Life has too many difficulties that seemed to get the better in me. Life won the fight in the long run, it just beating me down without giving me a chance to get up. I cant seem to continue if all I see is darkness. Sadly in this world I have done no bad, I dont drink, never touched drugs and am still pure. But no matter how clean I am, the nasty of the world was already around me from birth. My story is one with nothing but a broken rode and Im at the point Im about to cross my dead end sooner then I should. For me I only have the family within my house. But what if this house is broken. Kinda like me, I feel as if Im just a shell of nothing but emotions. There is nothing left but a storm of emotions no longer able to stay hidden. My heart is breaking on the inside and all I can do is feel the pain.
Im sorry…..
@blueHouse1931 Hello, you lovely human being. Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. I'm very sorry you have to go through this and feel this way- I can relate to some of it. For example, I feel like I'm not good enough either and it's eating me alive. Or my mother- not just my mother, everyone else around me not noticing how insanely bad I am. You think you are not a good role model, but actually, you are. Look at you! Look at how far you've come and didn't give up. You're incredibly brave and strong and that's why the person you dedicated the post to can look up to you. I just wanted to say you are not alone and I believe in you. You will heal, you just need to be patient and kind to yourself. All love x
@blueHouse1931
as a little sister, i can tell you were tougher than we look. you dont always have to carry the responsibility of being the big sister. lean on us a little. because as sisters, we will struggle through together. life changes, but i promise it gets better. hang on, and rely on help. the world is hard but you dont have to struggle alone. vent your feelings, take it one step at a time. soon you'll realise, youve conquered mountains, and youre still alive. life is short, dont shorten it further with feelings of inadequacy. you are more than enough. you matter. Stay strong 💜
Your anonymous Mapleleaf
@blueHouse1931 you're not alone through this. trust me i feel you and i can rely at so many levels.. take care of yourself, you deserve the best and sooner or later the wheel will turn don't worry.
seeing men with women they have female friends i dont my mum social worker etc have an issue with me wanting female friends my age group whendoesnt affect them or there business vey angry sick and tired of not having female friends and will be forced to interact with male support workers which is very unfair grrr
i'm so nervous. i'd like to apologize to my sister but i'm afraid she wouldn't accept it and she's not here yet and waiting for her is killing me. plus, i should be sleeping now because i have early exams tomorrow. what if she wouldn't accept it? and it would make me feel so sad that it might affect my performance on the exams tomorrow.
@plumField5702
hi,
I know im a bit late but how did it go? are you and your sister ok?
Your anonymous Mapleleaf
@Mapleleaf24
it's alright, thanks for replying. yeah, it went well. i'm glad.
My mom is in constant pain due to a health problem, I'm in constant pain due to a health problem, my friend is suicidal and I just feel so useless because there's nothing I can do about any of it.
@tluper6491 I know you feel guilty because you aren't able to help, but none of that is your fault and you're so NOT useless. The only thing you can do is be there for them and not let go. Show them how much you care and that will be enough.
@taylorlover13
I'm trying but it doesn't seem to work. My friend has just given up. I don't know what to do.
@tluper6491
hi, im sorry to hear youre suffering. with regard to your health, i can only advice to follow your doctors advice and take it easy, but i have some experience with depression.
My cousin committed suicide in 2015. in the end he made the choice he felt was right for him. but for you and your friend the only thing you can do is be there for your friend. talk to them. let them vent without weighing in your opinions or solutions unless your friend expressly wants them, no matter how helpful they may seem to you. check in on them regularly. it can never be too much. if they are up for it, take them out to enjoy nature, life in general. but thats pretty much all you can do. get them professional help, be their ear and shoukder, but know that ultimately you cannot be their hero. their choice is important and personal to them.
i think also, you may ask your friend if they are ok, and they say they are. but this is simply a way of not 'burdoning' you with their feelings. dont let this lull you into a false sense of security that they are feeling better. instead ask more directed questions like, how was your day today, what have you been thinking about recently etc. this way they dont give the automatic answer of "im fine".
i hope this can help, but i also want you to remember there is only so much you can do. its is normal to feel inadequate in situations such as these, but know that you are doing all you can, and that is more than enough. stay strong. 💜
Your anonymous Mapleleaf.
When i find a listener whose profile says they have dealt with mental health issues so you can relate you think will be a good fit and they block you grr
i am at a place where my heart feels like a downsized version of its original self. my tears well up at the thought of telling someone the things i have been through, the things i am going through