You can rant here

I do not want to live, but I have to. There are people depending on me. I am so tired I need this to end.

I was in an online relationship with someone I've never met and is abroad. My parents found out one day and didn't like me talking to strangers, for they have the fear of the dangers the internet can bring. To them, every single user on the internet are scammers. However, the relationship seemed balanced, plus neither me or my boyfriend did anything that could expose us to danger. The relationship was going smooth and he is the main reason I have more motivation, have been improving in school and have been understanding more about myself and my emotions. I feel emotionally safe around him. etc. I consider him a big part of my life.

My parents shouted and threatened me the day they found out, like they always do when they find out I'm doing anything they dislike. (When me and my brother were younger they used to hit us if we try to talk/fight back) I kept going back to contact my boyfriend however. I did it in secret. At that time I wanted to satisfy my parents and didn't want to let go of the relationship at the same time. Me and my boyfriend both decided together that both of us will focus and excel in academics, and to not put too much focus on the relationship to the point we're neglecting things in daily life. They found out about me still being in contact with him the second time.

Both of them told me they have decided to switch me from my current school to a poor local school near my hometown. At least that’s what they directly said. I understand that they sacrifice a lot just for me to attend the international school I'm going to which is far from where we live. Their daily routine alone makes them tired. I'd say the school I'm doing to is the best school. I've been improving a lot there, plus the staff is extremely supportive, even no judgement was given when I revealed that I was suicidal. It’s one of the only places I feel safe in. My parents said they did not want to spend effort and money on me anymore, and directly said they will be taking their love away & didn't care if I suffer in the local school. My mom also mentioned she didn’t care how good I did in academics anymore.

My parents, especially my mom expressed that they were heartbroken by my actions, my repeated rebellion. She feels that way as well because I wasn't being “truthful” to her. She wants me to open up completely to her. But the thing is I feel very unsafe emotionally around my parents. When I tried to explain this I got a response which was "Oh so you love the online stranger more than us then?". I would like to form a good relationship with my parents, I really do, but I just don't feel safe enough to do so. My mom says our relationship has a problem, and blames it on me. I feel like I’m forced to open up my emotions to them and I’m very scared of that too.

I am at fault too. I am at fault for not giving back what my parents deserve from their sacrifice.. I am at fault for not forcing myself to trust them with my emotions because they are my parents.. I am at fault for being ungrateful. I am at fault for not repressing my mood swings and expressing the frustration in front of my family. I am at fault for existing even though I did not choose this.

My mom is also blaming herself on this. She blames herself for “caring too much”, “loving us too much”, “not punishing us enough”, “being too lenient”. I always feel like a burden. I am a burden. My mom’s own children are her biggest nightmares. She said so herself. I feel like her life would be so much easier if I did not exist.

Last night, my parents demanded to video call my boyfriend. They threatened to report him to Interpol if he continues to talk to me. my mom screamed at him, accusing him of harrasing an underaged girl when he did not at all. My entire self went numb with anxiety that moment. I can never forget the fear in his eyes I saw from the screen. The last message I saw from his was “I have never harassed (my name)”. I wanted to thrust a knife through my throat. I wanted a bullet in my head. I wanted all this to end. What has been a threat became reality. I wanted to show my parents the fear they are making me feel. I feel horrible to make them feel so much heartbreak. But the way me and my brother were threatened was too much for me. I can’t go anywhere without feeling fear now.

Is what my parents are doing what I really deserve? I dont know what is the right thing to do. I dont want to let my parents down and at the same time i dont want to let this relationship go, it seems like i failed both and it makes me feel awful.

Oh shit. My dad was giving me a lecture about insurance companies I need to call. And shit. He kept repeating the information. It's like me teaching high school this year. I needed kids to verbalize my instructions back to me.

So I realized that when I saw it in my dad. I told him, ask me. Instead of telling me the info 10 mil times, ask me what did I hear. Cuz then I can show u I heard u. I didn't not hear u. I can prove it and rallied off what he told me. Shut I need to teach better than I am raised while I'm a 2nd year teacher.

Hi, my husband has recently told me that I am person who make hurtful comments and I ask him to give me an example when it really happened - he told me that I said ... during a conversation with my family members. I don't remember at all and even the conversation. This has never happen to and seems like my husband is lying and it made me more angry. I ask him for the details and when the conversation happened exactly and he just became angry and told me that I am crazy.

I am not sure if I am getting crazier like what he said or my husband just lying to prove his point that I am not a sensitive person.

Tired. Tired of online addiction. I have to stop scrolling.

I have been very depressed for the past two weeks and don't know what to do. A lot of my anxiety and depression comes from financial issues. Living paycheck to paycheck, not having a car, Relying on family who are not wanting to help. Feeling like a burden. Crying every day. I am sick of feeling like this.

Just been feeling tired, easily overwhelmed. Hopefully me coming back here more consistently will help me

I have been troubled by the behavior of a friend of mine. I'm saying this more out of spite, but I want a second opinion. We started hanging out in April, a nice girl, we went out, went to clubs and generally had a good time. I knew from the beginning that she wanted to find a boyfriend asap. But I didn't know what that meant for my peace of mind at the time... She calls me all the time and talks about her drama.. At first it wasn't bad she would say something about a date and then it wouldn't go to anything else. But this desperation also led her to impulsive acts with boys she doesn't even like and constant phone calls...even late at night. Same old same old... Once our friends told her without malice that she was a little tense and if she would relax a bit maybe she could get what she wanted. She called me at three am in the morning crying saying that she would d1e a virgin and that she felt lost. Right now, I have a father who has had a heart attack and needs outmost care and I need to find an apt,let alone a job,to support me and my brother,but I can't complain, I have to try. It's not important to her anyways,she must find out why is she so weird and annoying and no boy likes her when she is being constantly surrounded by guys.

I'm I wrong to uninvite a friend, when she is aware that I'm struggling. She demanded me to be her designated driver to the beach. And I immediately opened and closed that message. Girl I already have driving anxiety, be a little more considerate

Last year I quit working at a stable job of 9 years due to lack of pay and travel time, and began to pursue other options. A year later, I've landed a job as a mechanic - making far less money for much more effort. Its close to home but it has been a massive physical effort.I was ready to take a break from work entirely, but things didn't go as planned. I'm learning a lot at this job but the pay is a tough pill to swallow.

I cant keep job hopping forever. I feel like I'm a jack of all trades and have done everything from CAD and electronics engineering to construction to farmer...and could do anything I want.

I'm burned out. I just want to stop. I need a break but can't afford one. What do I do now?