blockage
So I'm an artist. I draw and paint, mostly. I have been doing digital art more often recently, but i do have a day job and lots of adult responsibilities. I also have depression.
It's making it extremely difficult to finish pieces of art. I have a goal of trying to do one digital painting a month, and I"m always struggling to meet it. It used to be really easy for me to create things when i was younger. I got to spend a lot of mental energy on my art. I think part of the reason i struggle with it nowadays is that i am too critical of my own work. i am afraid of messing up or having my art look weird.
perfectionism leads to avoidance. i don't know. it doesn't feel good. I want to be back to making things without the pressure that i put on myself. but I also don't know how to stop.
I can understand your feelings and depression first of all I want to appreciate your talent! I like to give you small suggestion ! try to discuss with your friends about it you can improve your focus and you can get support from your friends@affableStrings4654
@affableStrings4654 It's great you're an artist! I find art to be a really good coping skills for people in times of struggle. Perfectionism is a difficult thing to deal with, and I'm so glad you're aware of it and trying to work through it. We listeners are here for you! ❤️
@affableStrings4654 Hi! I am into digital arts too, and it is commendable that you are able to juggle so much! What you have shared sounds really hard... and I can feel how much your art means to you. It takes a lot of courage to open up about something so personal! Especially when it’s tied to something that once brought you joy and now feels weighed down by pressure. It makes sense that you’d feel stuck... because when you care so deeply about creating... perfectionism can creep in and steal some of that joy. I hear you when you say you just want to make things without the pressure! To reconnect with your younger version of yourself feels so real. Depression can make that even heavier... turning something that once felt natural into something that feels like a battle. You’re not alone in that feeling. My suggestion is that maybe it could help to remind yourself that even small creative moments count... like a quick sketch, or even just experimenting without judging the outcome! Sometimes letting yourself make “bad art” can be the first step toward rediscovering joy again! Your creativity is still there... even when it feels dimmed. You’re already doing something brave just by reflecting on it and reaching out. You got this!
@affableStrings4654
Yeah, it's really difficult. As an act of solidarity, I want to post my own writing about perfectionism, no how imperfect it may be :)
"I feel I've always been climbing a precipitous cliff, trying to get sky-high. I felt there was no time to rest. I felt the slightest mistake would send me careening to my death.
Now, I feel like I'm climbing a hill, taking a step at a time. The path up is hard. I can see that the path up isn’t always clear and that the way up has plateaus and valleys. But when I grow weary, I can always take a moment to breathe. The journey to the top is full of beautiful views to take in."
Try your best, forget the rest, and don't stress!
@Whatsupdog
I also love nature. It makes me realize that an "imperfect" tree or rock or flower can still be beautiful :)
@affableStrings4654 That sounds really frustrating and heavy to deal with. It’s hard when something that used to feel natural and joyful now feels blocked by pressure especially while you’re juggling work, responsibilities, and depression. It makes sense that perfectionism could turn into avoidance when you’re afraid of messing things up. You are more than welcome to contact listeners or Therapist on our 7 cups platform. I guess it would be really helpful for you.
@affableStrings4654 As an artist myself, I absolutely feel this. I do art for a living, and the depression absolutely makes it feel like my drawing hand doesn't work anymore. It's like the joy of drawing from being a child is completely dried up sometimes.
I end up finding the most joy in drawing in a really odd way. I let my friends dictate what strange things they want me to draw, and end up with digital canvases covered in total nonsense that only exists to make us laugh. I end up having drawn for two hours, and it feels like no time's passed.
Might not work for everyone, but it works for me. Drawing used to be fun, and the important thing is finding what made it fun for you from the beginning.
Good luck!
@buttergoblin ( i love that username btw!)
That does sound like a lot of fun! It's definitely worth a try! Thank you
@affableStrings4654 sounds like your art has shifted from being a sanctuary to feeling like another responsiblity on an already full plate . When youre navigating depression, that perfectonist voice can become so loud that it turns your creative outlet into a source of pressure rather than a source of joy.
Please be gentle with yourself. it’s not that you've lost your spark, it's just that you have less quiet space to let it breathe.
What if you gave your self permission tocreate something bad or weird just for the sake of playing? Sometimes the only way to silence perfectinism is to lean into the mess. Im here to listen with absolutely no pressure for you to producea masterpiece.