no motivation, I just feel so done

I'm 13, last school year was the worst year of my life and I can't tell you how scared I am for next year. I see a therapist but she's really mean, I mean like she laughs at me and when I cry she just makes me draw or something so she can eat. i kinda hate my mom, for like no reason and I hate myself for it. my cousin, who was my best friend, did something so stupid and mean to me and she doesn't care. I can tell my only friend doesn't like me. everyday is the same boring routene, I just watch YouTube all day or draw or something. in school I have such bad grades, I didn't pay attention one bit last year. I just wanna hug someone but it really feels like nobodys there for me. I think I'm so mean and idk how to be better. I just wanna move away and start over, I wish I was older so I could move out and be by myself, make some money and get a pet or something. we're so broke right now. I just feel so alone and so crowded at the same time.