@Snowwhite95 merry christmas I guess some people just don't like christmas did you at least get presents? i always get presents for christmas every year, at least you have family despite you guys not getting along. anyways Merry christmas and have a happy new year to you and your family
kitkat
Merry Christmas to you too!
We dont really do presents for Christmas.
Im glad that I at least have a family to spend the holidays with, as I realize that many people dont even have that.
@kitkat34567
@Snowwhite95 yeah i got some nice gifts but i understand christmas can be so expensive and not everyone can afford it so
@kitkat34567 yeah it can be very expensive, and Christmas isnt all about the gifts. Its about having a nice time and spending time together
@Snowwhite95 right i mean if you want gifts sometimes its good to make a list of things you might need or want gifts cards are always good so you can buy your own stuff as well
Be grateful for those you love and for those that love you back. I don't have any family and will be spending this day alone. However, that is not anything that is putting me down. God has blessed me in more ways than one, and I am thankful.
Merry Christmas, I hope you can find some way to make this season special!
Its not that Im not grateful for the family I have, as I realize that many people dont even have that.
Its just that it feels very lonely and unloving to spend Christmas like this.
But its probably better than being entirely alone.
@m1ndful
Merry Christmas @Snowwhite95 :) I'm in the same shoes as you are... I love Christmas! But even tho I'm personally non-religious, my family is Islamic and doesn't celebrate it... so I've always looked forward to spending Christmas with my friends and the people I love (non-family).
I really wanted to spend Christmas in Canada with my friends and boyfriend there and managed to get all the preparations and money covered for it too, but my parents wouldn't let me go. Now my parents and I are constantly fighting because our views are so drastically different. They're homeland-traditional and Islamic, while I'm international/global and non-religious (tho I've been keeping up a front to keep my family happy on the religious aspect).
Thankfully my parents are currently living in a different country than I am right now... but I'm stuck in my homeland for Christmas with extended family... which shouldn't be bad I guess, but they don't celebrate it and every time I think about how I could be spending it in Canada I get depressed.
I hope your Christmas isn't turning out too bad... but if you need someone to talk to, feel free to hit me up!! I'm just as lonely :')
I know! Christmas could be much better; even just by inviting extended family, or cousins so youre not with your own family whom you see every day of the year. That doesnt make it special.
I cant imagine not being allowed to go to your friends even if youve arranged everything already, especially since your family doesnt even celebrate Christmas anyway.
I wish I had any friends whom I could go to to spend the holidays, but unfortunately Im stuck wit my parents who make me feel unwelcome and unloved and just complain and pick a fight at everything I say or do (like visiting my grandmother, they hate the fact that they have 3 adult kids still in the backseat of their car).
@Allyzulu13
@Snowwhite95
Sigh... My parents don't exactly support the idea of me having friends abroad. Plus when they found out that my boyfriend is of a different cultural background and lives half a world away from my home country... they freaked out. So them not letting me visit Canada for Christmas is also them trying to prevent me to see my friends and boyfriend. Shitty, I know.
I'm sorry you're stuck with your parents :( are all your friends too far to visit for Christmas? That's awful that your parents make you feel unwelcomed and unloved... my parents have a strange way of showing love I guess... They're too focused on physical things like paying for my tuition, housing, food, clothes, phone, computer, etc. and they view this as showing affection. I'm quite used to this, so growing up I never really talked to my parents much because they typically just left me alone. But now that I left home, suddenly they are expecting attention and affection from me but... I didn't develop a strong sense of emotional attachment to them when I was young, which makes this very taxing for me.
I'm sure (or at least I hope) your parents do love you and want to make you feel welcome. It's just that... some parents can't show it properly.
So your parents dont support your international mindset? Thats a difficult situation. You cant stay in the same community your whole life..
As for friends, I dont really have any friends, at least not to spend Christmas with. So Im also kinda stuck at home.
My parents do love me, I think. They just dont show it most of the time. They have a specific idea of what my life should look like and what I should do. They want me to behave like ‘normal people do. Im continuously compared to others, to who I dont live up. That sucks.@Allyzulu13
@Snowwhite95
Well... it's a bit complex. My parents like to "cherry pick" a few international traits that they like (not that many tho), but for the most part they don't support my international mindset. Yeah, it's a very difficult situation and I'm having difficulty finding a reason why to love my parents because of it. So in a sense... I understand how you feel. My parents also don't show it most of the time and have this ideal image of how their daughter should be. They weren't very involved in my upbringing as a kid and I feel that now that I'm in University they are suddenly trying to change me entirely. So yeah... if you feel as though your parents aren't exactly loving.. or supportive... or understanding... I understand.
As for friends... I'm sorry it's like that for you :( It must be tough... if you can't find support in your family, it must be incredibly emotionally straining to not have a friend you can lean on either. I hope that the people in this community, including myself, will be able to give you that emotional support that you need :)
Thank you! Thats exactly it. Theyll have a ideal picture of what they want my life to be, by continuously comparing me to other people my age, and trying to force me to be someone Im not, like your parents do!
It is really difficult to have a family who doesnt believe in mental or emotional problems at all, and having no friends to go to either. Which is why Im seeking contact via this community, to be able to talk to others about what Im feeling.
@Allyzulu13
@Snowwhite95
This is my very first reply so sorry for any mistakes or rules i havent followed. I'm actually from India and in here christams is not celebrated at all. Very few people celebrate it. Like one in a hundred. I have always wanted to celebrate Christmas like properly. I imagine Christmas like I'm in a country where it snows and i wake up with snow all around, call my friends and we all play and have fun. Then our family having a huge dinner with other family friends and to end this marvellous day, a present. But in india this festival is considered no more than a national holding to relax(such a shame). I really hope it could be like what i imagine someday. Sorry if i have been too carried away in my thoughts.
@creativeandbeautiful2
A national holiday i mean. Sorry
Yeah exactly. That sucks if you dont get to spend Christmas at all, even though you want to.
And to spend it with many people you love and have a nice time. Like playing games or watching a movie together. For us, were all watching a different movie. My brother is locked up in his room playing PlayStation, and the rest of us are watching Netflix on our own phone with headphones in. Not really a family feeling. @creativeandbeautiful2