What to do when loneliness consumes me?
Hi so for the last few months I have felt tremendously lonely. During my childhood, I never had many reliable, trustworthy friends. I often felt friendless because nobody seemed to really care or appreciate me that way. My family and I are close but sometimes I feel that it's not enough.
My first year in secondary has been horrible. I had some friends who I realized more and more were treating me like dirt. My mental illness struggles finally caught up with me a few months ago and, one family supported me through. I missed so much school and lost contact with my "friends". They never reached out, even though they suspected that I was struggling with my mental health (I found this out later.) I subsquently have ended my relationships with them.
Now it's the summer and I feel lonelier and lonelier. I want a whole bunch of friends and don't know what to do next year. I really struggle with keeping friends. Social media can be hard to keep up with I find. I want some reliable people in my life. How do I cope with feeling so lonely? I have tried books and movies. I sometimes drown in them so much that I feel lonlier. Sometimes the feeling is just so debilatating and it is starting to really consume me. Sometimes I just what to drown it in though. What do I do? Any suggesstions? How can I not let the feeling consume me? How do I stop drowning? Does this make sense?
@Hufflepuff27
You stop what you are doing right now, and you go out and talk to people.
Friendship is a two-way street. Don't invest in someone who doesn't invest in you reciprocally. Find friends of quality not by numbers. Find the ones that will be there when you are at lowest, not the ones that are only at your best. And make sure to treasure them when you do find the right ones.
As for making friends, there are plenty of places you can make friends. Schools, local libraries, school clubs, signing up for an activity, concerts, parks, online forums and so on are all good places where you can start looking. But the funny realistic thing is that if you don't look, then nothing will ever happen. Friends don't magically appear. You have to be willing to initiate conversations and talk to other people in order to make friends. And in life, you will CLICK with some people and you won't with other people.
I have two ways I can teach you how to start a conversation.
The Jokester
"Wanna hear a joke?"
"Sure"
"What do you call a fake noodle?"
"I don't know what?"
"An Impasta!"
"Haha that's funny"
"Thanks, my name is X, what's your name?"
The Lost Explorer
"Do you know how to get to the school's library?"
"Yeah, you go that way"
"Thank you, by the way I am ______, what is your name?"
Be fun, be unique and make a lasting impression. People like fun.
Best~
@SenpaiXD Thank you! This is some amazing advice. I really never thought of making friends by being a lost explorer or a jokester.
@Hufflepuff27
Hey there. I understand what you are going through. It's strange though we live different lives but when it comes to loneliness we all can relate to it.
I guess one of the most important thing is for the time that you have with yourself, is the time you should get to know yourself better. It's true we are nobody if we are all alone in this world righ? What is life without having anybody to share it with yes? But you see like yourself and me we are strugggling with something that others are not. You have your mental illness. I have my personal issues. These things obstacles/challenge is quite a burden to carry yes? And others are not going through what you are going through. So how can they possibly understand.
But ofcourse there are other people out there who are blessed with really caring and loving in people in their lives. No matter what bad circmumstances come their way, they are never alone. I wish i was in their shoes no kidding!, i'm not lying cause going through life all by yourself is the most difficult thing to do and yes i'm not strong, i too am only human, i too break down, i too give up.
What i'm trying to say is try to learn to care and love yourself as you are. Even the smallest things, like eating good healty food, exercise, i mean get into something that you enjoy doing (alone) but it brings joy to you. Write in a diary if you don't have anybody to share your bad moods etc. Try and dress up nicely once in a while. Take care of your appearence. Build self confidence from here. But most importantly use the time that you have now cause you are young. You are only young once. Because as you grow older you will have less time for yourself.
i forgot 1 more thing. Do you have a pet or plant? If not get 1 today, cause they will love unconditionally. Not like those humans LOL 
@Kate30 Lol. Thank you for your amazing input!
