I feel suffocated
Hey guys,
This is my first time reaching out for help so let’s see how this goes.
My family has high expectations of me especially with school. I was known for doing well in all areas. Until I entered university. I’ve been struggling but they assume I do well. Of all my siblings, I’m the one who shows no weakness. I don’t cry, I don’t complain. It’s eating me alive. I want to cry but cannot. I’m failing but I’m too afraid to confront my parents about it. I know all the answers to my problems but executing it is hard. I’m in my second year of uni, with a low GPA. My whole family as well as extended family look to me as an example for their kids. Pretending to be alright in front of others is really taking a toll on me. My family unaware of this, says comments that really trigger me but again, I show no weakness.
Im ruined. I’ve fallen into depression but I don’t show it in front of others.
Please help.
Hi, it seems that you have always had a great responsibility on your shoulders, also to set the right example for your siblings. So it is understandable that you feel this way now. We are human beings and as such also fallible at times, but we put this aspect in the background for fear of disappointing the expectations that others give us. But in this case we are talking about unrealistic expectations. You won't always be able to meet the expectations the world has of you, and that's okay. You don't need to feel guilty or bad in any way, rather you need to stop ignoring yourself and your needs. You are important, your needs are important and your emotions are important. It is not easy to get out of this situation after a long time, but we are here to help you and listen to you in the best way we know
Have faith in yourself. You'll be successful and happy one day I'm sure of it. Don't let others expectations bury you and don't underestimate yourself. We've been through a lot past 2 years. You aren't alone everyone ik including me feel like we are failing but it isn't the truth. Parents don't know us much they are healing from their own traumas I hope you find the strength to forgive them. You can show it here and being vulnerable and asking people for help doesn't make you weak. It takes a lot of strength to be open to someone. All of this will make you strong. You are trying really hard and I'm proud of you. Keep going.
