This is my first time using something like this
I’m 14m and I feel like nobody appreciates me ever since the only girl I ever liked killed herself. Is there anything I can do to make this feeling of emptiness go away? I doubt it will get better from here on out for me anyways. I really have nothing going for me. This is my first time doing something like this. I have always been kind of a reserved person. No one knows the real me and I just put on these fake personalities that people know me by. I wouldn’t mind if I died right now. I actually think that the people I call friends don’t care about me. They just use me for their own benefit. Whenever I stop texting first they never ask me something. I don’t know. My parents have been distant most of my life too. When they heard that Alissa offed herself they just hit me with an “oh” and told me to move on because I was a teenager. I just can’t though and I’m in physical pain because of how much I miss her and I would rather have killed myself if it meant bringing her back. She was so smart and cool I can’t do anything without her. She didn’t even message me or anything and when I asked her. I don’t know if I will be able to love someone again.
Teggy, first I am so sorry to hear about Alissa. Hearing about another young person taking their life is an utter devastation and yet another failure of society to support each other and set examples and hope for the youth. It is not something to brush off, you are correct in believing that. And it is certainly not fair that the world was so hard on this young individual that they felt that this was the only way out. I am not good at giving advice but I wanted to let you know that I acknowledge and grieve this tragedy. The best thing you can do is honor her memory by living the life she would want you to have. Embody the values you saw in her and inspired you to be a better person.
As for your other social issues, all I can say in my time living is that you will meet all kinds of people on this Earth in your life as you get older and they will be much more meaningful connections than your high school groups. I also want to note that we are in a dumb and confusing time in society as well at the moment because the rate that AI and technology has increased has genuinely negatively impacted people’s social skills. I promise things used to be different. Give it time for humanity to wake up and things will probably change for the better.
One more thing, I know probably a lot of people have thrown this number at you but you can text the crisis hotline, 988, and it will just be a nice person you can tell your situation to. I’ve called and texted them a few times in my life and genuinely felt better after talking to someone for a few minutes each time. Sorry for my long response!! 🌼