tw‼️ sh relapse

@nicoyazawasnumber1fan I am so sorry to hear you've been struggling with self-harm. Feelings of guilt after a relapse can be tough to cope with. What thoughts have been going through your mind as you try to be gentle with yourself during this difficult time? You don't have to go through this alone, please know we are all here with you to listen to and to support. 

@nicoyazawasnumber1fan

I'm sorry you've been experiencing this, friend. Self-Harm is very hard to quit. Luckily, it's not impossible. Let me give you an overview on what you can do when feeling the urge to self-harm. (This is not advice, just inspiration on what you could do in difficult situations. In emergencies, please call 911 or your country's equivalent immediately!)

1. Do NOT feel guilty when it does happen

Recovery is not a straight path. It has its ups and downs. Although it's not good for you, it's okay that you sometimes slip and go back to old habits. Don't beat yourself up about it, it won't help you. Instead, try a more positive approach and try and

2. reflect on why it happened

If you self-harmed you should at first seek medical attention if necessary. Once you feel ready, you could reflect on what happened directly before, during and after cutting/burning/etc. Focus on feelings, events and triggers. It would be best to keep all those notes in a diary-type of thing. Here are some prompts that might help. Feel free to change them to your liking and make up new ones!

*cut is used here but it really can be any kind of self-destructive behavior

2.1 Before

- What triggered me before I cut* myself? Did anything happen?

- Where was I? What was the time of day? The season?

- In whose company was I?

- How did I feel?

- What did I think? Are those thoughts true?

2.2 During

- What did I feel while cutting?

- What did I think while cutting?

- What's my internal reason for doing it? (e.g. punishing yourself, numbing pain, transferring mental pain to the body)

2.3 After

- Did I actually feel better?

- What did I think generally?

- What did I think about the cutting? (e.g. shame)

- What could I have done instead?

3. Doing something else + Prevention

There are many "substitutes" for self-harming. These include: Drawing on your skin in red pen, doing creative activities as an outlet, doing sports, ...

Again, don't put yourself down if you don't manage to stop yourself from self-harming.

If it helps, you can make a step-by-step plan on what to do to prevent self-harming. This can start with exercises for slight discomfort and can peak for when you're being so distressed you need to dunk your head into ice water.

3.1 Support

One of the most important things is a support network. This can be online, e.g. on 7cups with a specific listener, or in real life with friends, family, teachers, etc. It might also be a good idea to contact a mental health professional for more assistance.

If you need any more support, feel free to contact a listener, me included! We might not be able to straight up advise you on what to do, but we can listen and provide help on finding solutions to your problems (e.g. by brainstorming together).

Take care. You matter. Reach out and we'll help the best we can!