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Hi! I joined a few days ago but I've just found this post.

I have never thought what I had was depression (or something like that) until a few months ago. I've experienced periods of sadness, tiredness, unwillingness to do anything, suicidal thoughts since I was in middle school, but I remember my parents labelling it as 'laziness' or 'teenager behavior', and not giving it so much importance. I've read online many stories of people struggling with depression and I recognized some of the symptoms I had. I have never been diagnosed with anything, because my parents made fun of me when I tried talking with the school psychologist in high school, so I've never even tried therapy again. I've felt that bad at least two more times since middle school, and now I've decided to reach for help because I've lost one of my grandmas last December, and the other one is very old and very sick, and I'm afraid of feeling really bad again. On the outside I try to appear as much normal as I can, but I hope here I can finally open up and say how I truly feel.

Hi im v. Ive been feeling down and unsettled for quite awhile now. i dont know who i should talk to so i decided to go here instead.