30 day chronic illness challenge

Day 1:

i have endometriosis amd PCOS. I had a full hysterectomy this past January at the age of 29. I am now dealing with menopause and the fact that I will never have children. On top of that I have recently begun having migraines.

Day 2: The endometriosis has caused me pain, but hasn't had too much of an affect on my life. The fibromyalgia has completely fucked up my life. It started at 12. I never really got to be a teenager. It has seriously affected my school. It has completely destroyed my youth and my life. It has caused depression. God it has caused so many issues.

Day two: these illnesses have caused me tons of pain, resulting in many surgeries and tons of pain medication. It has led me to a narcotic addiction and depression. I miss work way too often and am risking losing said job.

Does anyone have PCOS and wants to talk ?

Day 14: Give five things you are grateful for.

My pets, my art, martial arts, my muse, and sleep when I can get it.

Day 25: Name 5 activities you have managed to pursue while being ill and 5 activities that you have done that you wouldn't have pursued if you hadn't become ill.

This is another question I put off for a while because it sounded difficult. I'm dedicated to finishing this challenge now, though, so I'm going to try my best to answer it. Thankfully, I've had my partner's support with it. He helped me think of some examples. I think one reason it's so hard is because there's a thin line between being sick and not sick. I've had a lot of symptoms ever since I was little; they've just gotten much worse over time. I'm also not sure if I should include mental health issues, though I think I will because it can be hard to separate them from the physical ones. (For example, cerebral folate deficiency directly stops chemicals from being sent to the brain, and narcolepsy can cause hallucinations and similar issues.) Anyway, probably didn't need to say all that. Sorry. I'll start with 5 activities I've continued to pursue while being sick.

1) Playing video games. Although now I think it's more of a disraction than it is for fun, it's one of the things I've kept doing the most.

2) Creative makeup. Sadly, I've been doing this less and less over time, but it's a really good creative outlet when I have the time and energy. It's definitely gotten harder has my tremors and muscle jumps have gotten worse... At least that gives me a challenge?!

3) Going to school. I've had to go to college part-time and take time off from school completely due to my illnesses, but I've still been able to pursue it. Trying to be grateful for this.

4) Walking. I know. I'm lucky I can walk in the first place. I definitely have to limit myself, though. Some days I shouldn't because I'll feel really sick in a few hours/days, and other days I can barely lift my head and can't even sit up without the help of a neck brace (and even with it, I can't sit for long). I have some decent days, though. On those days, going for a walk can actually make me feel better if it's not too cold.

5) Drawing. Okay, I'm going to admit I haven't done this much. It's to the point where I might doodle a little like once a month, but it's something I've continued to do, even if I've done it less often. Me spending less time drawing is partially due to lack of motivation and partially to my thumb being unable to stay in the right position when writing/drawing. And that leads to thumb and/or arm nerve pain. Luckily it only gets bad if I draw/write for a long time, so as long as I remember to take breaks, I should be fine!

Okay, now I'm going to list (or try to list) 5 things I wouldn't have done if it wasn't for getting sick.

1) Travel to Minnesota and New Mexico. This one might sound a bit odd, but there's a high chance that I never would've gone to these places if it wasn't for being sick. Because there aren't many doctors who specialize in mast cell disorders, we had to travel to Minnesota several times to see a professional. I even got to hang out in Minnieappolis for several days. It's such a pretty place. My family traveled to New Mexico because it was suggested to my mom (who a few of the same health conditions) and I to move somewhere dry. It also has legal medical marijuana. So, basically, we went there to check out some neighborhoods we could move into.

2) Research. This one probably isn't too surprising. I definitely have a lot more to learn about my health conditions, but I doubt I would've known anything about them if I never had to deal with them. That's a plus I suppose.

3) Met doctors. Okay, I'm running out of ideas, so the next few things may be obvious. If I wasn't sick, I wouldn't have met nearly as many doctors. That means I've met many people of different backgrounds and personalities, and I think that may have expanded me as a person. Wow, I might start getting emotional now.

4) I've met other nice chronically ill people online. There is something relieving about hearing others' stories, especially when they've gone through similar things to what you've gone through. Now it's hard to believe that I probably never would've heard of most of these people if I never got sick.

5) I'm skilled at swallowing pills. Okay, I'm not sure if "skilled" is the right word. (And obviously I ran out of ideas again. My partner came up with this one.) Thanks to my health conditions, I can now swallow over 20 pills at once--many of which are those huge oil supplement. (Doesn't mean I don't get nauseas after taking them, though.)

Okay, I officially listed 5 things!!... And made this much longer than it needed to be. I'll try to be back tomorrow to answer the next day's question.

DAY 1

Hi please call me Star,

I have so many chronic illnesses most people think I make it up so I hide them and never complain but my husband see that I take 20 pills a day and I'm only in my 30's. I struggle to appear 'normal' and know that I shouldn't need to. None of my 'friends' have any idea except for my husband.

I have PTSD, generalized anxiety, major depressive disorder, fibromyalgia, narcolepsy (with cataplexy), chronic almost daily migraines, arthritis and herniated discs in back with siatica (& radiating pain down left leg).

Because I hide this daily from everyone I'm exhausted. I need somewhere I can just be myself. I thought here was a good place to start. I'm scared of being treated differently or of being thought I am making it up (I'm not). I'm in so much pain and sometimes I wish people knew so that I didn't always feel like I was so detached from everyone.

I was born with spina bifida

Day 26: What impact has this had on your friends, family, partner, parents, etc.?

This one is kind of difficult because I've been sick for most/all of the time people have known me. Also not quite sure how I'm going to organize this, so that's been keeping me from writing it. I'll probably just organize it by relationship type.

Friends - I don't think I have many friends who are close enough to be affected by my illnesses. I feel a lot of guilt or embarrassment when bringing them up, and people often don't know what to say or how to react. It probably affects them in one way or another, but I would have a hard time knowing how because it's not something anyone would bring up. They have expressed some confusion over some things I have to do to take care of my health, though (such as consuming high salt or doing physical therapy). I think my mental illnesses have affected them more than anything; they never really understood me suddenly avoiding them for long periods, and they probably don't get the constant loss of memories. I don't know what they think/feel about any of that to be honest.

Family - It definitely seems like my illnesses have been affecting my family because they have to spend more time around them than anyone else (especially since I'm still living with my parents). I think it's gotten to the point of exhausting my mom, who has to take care of her own medical issues on top of helping me with mine. It's hard to tell what my dad and brother are thinking, but I'm sure it affects them one way or another, especially since it makes my mom more stressed and costs my family a lot more money.

Partner - Sadly, I think my illnesses affect my partner a lot. We often can't do as much as we (or at least I) would like to do because I often lack the energy and/or don't want to feel sicker. He also ends up taking care of me a lot, which I'm sure takes up a lot of time and energy. And because of the highly suspected BPD (by a myself and later a psychologist), things can get really chaotic, and I personally can get (or almost get) emotionally abusive. Thankfully, he has learned to not take it seriously and talk me down, but I'm sure it all takes an emotional toll on him. Really hoping to get a lot of this stuff under control before long...

That's it I guess. Didn't think this would get that long. Hopefully, some day, this will all have less of an effect on others.

Day 13

Yes it does affect my mental health. Sometimes I feel like I can't do what others can do my age. I feel I won't be able to achieve what I want. I just want to work like 50 hours a week but I'm too tired all the time. Or I want to exercise but it holds me back. I cry sometimes over my health, because of those reasons but also because I'm worried for my own health and my future but doctors/specialists don't seem too bothered about trying to get me answers.