Binge eating , feeling fat, vacation with family

I feel so lost. I am struggling with binging for some time now. After I had anorexia I started binging during recovery but instead of healing I got the binge eating disorder and now I already gained weight [Edited by Erato, 7/22/19 to remove specific mention of weight count. Please read the ED support subcommunity guidelines here.] (height:176cm). I feel so fat. And I am going on vacation tomorrow, with my family (who is super skinny) and I am so afraid that my family will judge my body. I feel so lost. I dont know what to do anymore. I feel so fat and ugly