Sugar addiction and Diabetes

I have C-PTSD, DID, resulted from very long term sexual abuse since very young age. I've developed eating disorder getting addicted to high levels of sugar resulting in diabetes type 2, and fatty liver, obesity, mood swings, depression and what not. I know I should get control over my nutrition. I'm not in therapy because can't afford paying for it in any way. wondering how to stop this destructive path of eating bad foods. it's hard when all the cheaper foods which are more affordable for me, are full of sugar and bad fat. I don't know how to make a change myself without having professional support.

Also, having PTSD and constant high levels of stress increases the sugar levels in blood stream, making it almost impossible to balance the sugar levels. I get ill a lot, because of weak immune system, feeling exhausted all the time, which makes it hard to even consider physical exercise. body feeling heavy all the time, drained, and alert because of PTSD symptoms. it's like being caught in a vicious circle of neglecting body and mind. It doesn't matter anymore that the source of this isn't my fault, but a result of the sexual abuse. It doesn't make me feel better to know it's not my fault, because my body and mind are still my responsibility, and always will be.

I want to take responsibility over these problems. I want to take action to make myself healthier and feel better. I find it really hard to do, to change bad eating habits, and being stressed 24/7 over flashbacks and dissociating - all behavioral patterns that shaped my life for the 30 years I'm here. feels like I'm in an important crossroad, because my physical health is deteriorating and I get a lot of infections suffering pains a lot. I have to find a way to get out of this vicious circle, before it would truly get to a "no return point", where there won't be much to do anymore for my health.

@JoyCS

@Tali

@Paulislistening