Downs of recovery
TW : pessimist outlook, Ed reference
Hey guys!
Today is one of those days that just feel like crap.
For a better understanding here is some of the background story: I am bipolar 2, and struggled with some eds. My family jokes around a lot, and of the topics is weight. When they gain weight, for whatever reason they call it “the fatties club”. (My family isn’t even fat) Honestly I don’t know why they do it, it’s just a thing. And that is very triggering specially when they ask why am I so afraid of the scale and say that I am a member of their stupid club.
My dad was a comando and he thinks he knows everything that there’s to know about nutrition and exercise. Even though his outlook is toxic and promotes self hatred.
Lately it’s just been one thing on top of the other.
Today I had to step on the scale on my way to the doctor and I am at my heaviest. I am feeling like relapsing after 3 years.
I am eating healthy and taking care of myself, but my mds make me gain weight.
I know that I can’t do that to myself. But what can I do? I hate looking like this.
Sorry if I am not making a lot of sense, I’m not okay today.
@rationalMango770 Hey. I understand how you feel. It stinks that we can't just take care of ourselves and also be at the weight and appearance we want. Seeing weight gain triggers me too. I hate it. So I understand 💯. Could you add in some exercise to your routine - yoga, weight training, walking, swimming - whatever you like? That tends to help for me both in the immediate endorphin rush from exercise and just feeling more confident in my appearance because of the increased strength and tone. What do you think?
💙
