feeling stupid
So I am rooming with a friend, and just now I was microwaving something and using the electric kettle at the same time. I was using them at opposite ends of the kitchen, so I didn't know they were on the same breaker. I went down to the board, where I knew I could simply flip them back. But I was unsure which one to flip, because they all seemed to be at the "on" position. I checked a few times, and went over the list written on the door of what breaker went to which thing. Still confused.
So then I asked them for help, because I was confused. The entire time I expected them to treat me like i was an idiot, or that I should have known and was making a stupid mistake. I didn't want to start flipping things at random, because that could disrupt things that others were doing. But I felt like i was bracing for ridicule the whole time. My friend flipped the breaker ( one that I had homed in on but had questioned myself about) and it fixed the problem. And my friend didn't make fun of me or look at me weird or anything. But I still felt like they thought i was an idiot.
This feeling comes from some other situations where i have asked for help ( also because i am a collaborative problem solver, and i want to involve others in things that pertain to everyone that's sharing the house) and it seemed like they thought the solution was easy and i should have just done it myself. Like they were confused that I wanted to collaborate/ needed help. And while I do know some things, I don't want to make a big mistake and mess things up for everyone, so I like to get confirmation before I do things. And it often makes me look like I'm helpless or stupid, which i don't think that I am.
Now i'm just left with a weird feeling.
@affableStrings4654 LOL! Not laughing at you, but I have experienced that feeling myself. You will learn to cut yourself slack. I sometimes overthink in a situation, and it sometimes drives me a bit crazy, but no one is born an electrician, and some of us like to think things through. And some people just don’t think about much at all, and they are the ones who blow things up or get electrocuted. No one ever died of embarrassment. What did you have in the microwave? Now I’m getting hungry.
Cheers!
@helpfulAvocado7912
I had broccoli and beef with rice! It ended up being really tasty!
@affableStrings4654
Honestly I can totally find myself in that same situation, I'm notoriously bad with working simple cable and electrical stuff that even my mom is in disbelief. It can be embarrassing but I always think, "at least this situation won't happen again"
@affableStrings4654 I can relate a lot. I definitely would not have understood that breaker situation lol and might have turned off all the lights in the house LOL, so I think you did the right thing asking for help. I have a hard time with these types of skills too, because my parents didn't teach me a lot, and it's hard when it feels like other friends were better prepared for life and don't understand why I might not know something. However, I try to feel positive that I can learn from my friends, and I do have some things I know to share in return. I think it's totally okay to struggle with those thoughts and feelings right now and hopefully the more you keep communicating and asking for help it will open things up.
@affableStrings4654
Its OK to be unsure about something, or even to make a mistake! It doesn’t make you ‘stupid’ .. Being imperfect is perfectly human. 😊 It’s how we learn and evolve!
Someone who knows the breakers should probably just put small identifying labels on all of them to remove that whole confusing situation altogether.
CatsInTheCradle