I wish I could tell everybody that...

I wish I could tell everybody that I am in so much pain. I can't tell if it's mental or physical. Waking up is alarming and painful every day, but I have to pretend that I'm fine. I work two jobs and I can't bring my problems with me...

I wish I could peacefully sleep. I'm just so tired.

I wish I could tell everybody that I am afraid and have doubts but I still need to get chances.
I wish I could tell everybody that none of this is ideal but it's the closest thing to not hating everything.

I wish I could tell everybody that I need my addictions.

I wish I could tell everybody that all I want is to sleep.
I wish I could tell everybody that giving it my all puts me into physical pain.
I wish I could tell everybody that I'm trying so hard because I feel worthless.
I wish I could tell everybody not to blame me for my suffering.

I wish I could tell my chrildren how much I miss them and how much I wish they were a part of my life. I wish I could scream it loud enough that they would understand how much I love them and I want nothing more than to know everyday they are ok. To know that they are safe.

My kids are grown they do not stay in touch. Im stuggling letting go and letting my fears go of troubles they could get into ect.

I can't tell you how I miss them. Thier annoying text messages, the way they fight with one another and stand up for one another. I really miss the talks we've had over the years! They were the very best times of my life!

Thanks everyone for listening. Pamelalynn😜

That I get nervous easily. I am shy. I hear voices and it confuses me a lot. I think I have been experiencing intrusive thoughts about sex and violence and its really scary!!!!!!

I experience a lot of stress and anxiety. I dont deal with rejection well and can easily freak out about it. I have a fear of abandonment but i am not sure why.

I get confused about reality. I make too many assocations between dream symbolism and life. It makes me anxious. Life starts to feel like i am gettin gmessages all the time and its creepy.

i feel tired. I just want a week of peaceful sleep, no nightmares, no crying, no anxiety attacks.

I want to be happy.

Everything i do is just timefiller to me...i dont see a reason for being here and i cant seem to find one no matter where i look..i dont want to kill myself but i just cant seem to find the beauty and adventure i used to as a kid...no matter how good or bad people say i am at things in my head i always reply "meh"..i want to have motivation to be happy and to live my life to the fullest, but everytime i start i end up asking why until i quit again..

I wish i could tell everyone that I CAN'T EFFING DO IT! I cannot be the person they want me to be. I am who i am and i can't change it....no, i am not like those kids who study all day and are almost perfect.....no, i am not like those kids who seem to have no flaws. Alright, i am good at studies but no, i am not perfect at them. There are certain things i dislike and i can't do them unlike the other class toppers. And no, i can't and i dont give a fuck about getting rank 1 in my tenth boards so stop putting pressure on me to do so. Please, lets just see what i am good at ....because i dont have to be good every damn thing! There r certain subjects on which i am better than them....why dont u see that?! STOP IT.. BECAUSE I CAN'T DO IT - BE JUST AMAZING AT EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT! and tbh all this pressure you put on me, trying to make me the way you want me to be ...its just killing me...so stop. It ..

I wsh i could tell evrybody i have anger issue's

I wish that I could tell people that I have a stalker and not lie to them. I can't go to your party because I have to face the person who terrifies me with their presence....not because I'm 'sick' or 'grounded'.

I wish I could tell everyone that I am scared of being alone and I'm tired of pretending that I can do everything right. I am tired to be so emotionless and I'm tired that I could never cry in front of anyone else and I'm just tired that I have to wait for everything. That no matter how good I am, I still won't get what other have right now.

And I wish I could tell people that I am tired being the one they know

I wish I could tell everybody that I'm not fine. That I AM NOT OKAY. I wish I could tell everyone that I'm just putting a brave face; but deep inside, I feel lost, I feel scared, I feel that I'm a big failure. I wish I could just easily say what's inside my head and what's going on in my heart. I wish I am strong enough to take care of myself and not be a burden with anyone. I wish I could tell my parents how sorry I am on every piece of sh*t that I put them through-- that I am very sorry for being a burden, for being weak. And I wish that I have the guts and confidence to tell and promise them that someday, I'l be the one who will take care of them-- because right now, I'm doubting myself whether I would be able to do that or not.

Those were just wishes, and I don't know if I'll be able to make those wishes come true.