What's the last thing you want to hear when you need support?
Hmm, there's a few for me..
I'm too busy (I've supported people but when it's my turn, there's no time)
If I were you I would....... (But you're not me. I would rather you possibly share an experience and let me draw my own conclusion)
Your problems aren't important (Well they are to me, enough to stay dwelling on my mind)
I don't understand, therefore what's the point of listening? (Even if you don't fully get it, ask questions or ask me to say it in a different way to help you comprehend it or maybe just listen to me vent, usually I'm not seeking answers anyway)
@ScrabbleBrain
” I’m sorry “ - my head -why are you sorry??? You didn’t do anything. Saying a plain sorry of not supportive!!!
“Why did you do that!” Um cause I’m trying
or when I’m low and crying and people TRY to make me laugh. It’s not funny.
I find that asking me questions and allowing me to come up with an answer is helpful, when I need space-allow it, and don’t ignore me and go on about your problem.
Thanks for sharing with me :) I wasn't sure if this was a good question or not but yes it's strange things people say and do that are well meaning but not helpful.
I just remembered the one that was constant.... "Cheer up, it might never happen" How do you know what I'm going through, what I've been through?
I don't think it's healthy to pretend we are alright when we are clearly not. That's why I liked going for a walk, my brain just chatted away, solving confusing problems or I wrote in a journal and it tumbled out, at times.
Cheer up is definitely an annoyance.
I thought this was a good question. Maybe it will allow me to say what I need in an emotional moment because I just went through what is unhelpful. ❤️
@peachThinker662 You're more than welcome anytime to drop by :) and/or if creating your own post helps, that's an option too. There's a diary thread, a your writing thread.
Either way it's interesting to hear from others. Everyone has these beautiful perspectives :)
@ScrabbleBrain
you’re so kind 💖💖
@peachThinker662 That's sweet of you to say that :) Much appreciated.
I think finding your own voice can be hard enough so I like to nudge it along where possible ha :)
Facts!!!
And thank you for that
@peachThinker662 I struggled to find my own voice and only felt safe to open up as an adult and still, took a while to be able to figure out the noise in my head, to then decipher it and think Ahh, so that's what you're trying to say..
I get where you are coming from :)
@ScrabbleBrain
The one my eldest daughter asks me 5 - 6 times a day is "Are you OK?"
If I answer anything other than "I'M OK" she gets upset with me, like I'm not supposed to be anything other than OK.
@braindamag3 That's stressful sorry to hear that. Hopefully one day your communication styles will suit both of you :)
"I'm thinking about you"
This is literally not helpful. lol <3
Ask me if I want a grocery run, or a trip to the arcade, or a ride home, or if I'd like to vent...
@jesusredeemedme2425 That's interesting, thanks for adding that :)
I guess it's similar to the Um Yea meant to check up on you, oops.
@ScrabbleBrain
I hate hearing get over it or are you not over that by now?
@Amanda84 Ooh I knew you'd have a good one. I didn't even think of that :)
We all process differently I need to take time out and really analyse everything from all sides and even then I'll forget to point something additional out and also make sure I'm making sense.
@ScrabbleBrain
💜🥰
@ScrabbleBrain go talk to mom or grandma about it
@shootalotfilmsyt Nice input thank you. That must be hard to hear.