(Article) 10 Strategies for Dealing with Passive-Aggressive People (Part 1)

Read Part 2 here

Any behavior that consists of indirect resistance towards others, combined with the avoidance of direct and clear communication can be described as passive-aggressive. One example is the old friend from high school who seems interested in getting together when you mention it, but then makes excuses when you start comparing schedules. Another is the parent who gives their child a backhanded compliment by saying, “That dress fits you great, considering your body type.”

Passive aggressiveness can be uncomfortable to experience, and may leave us wondering if we are responsible for the awkward dynamics at play. Although the root causes of this behavior are typically deep-seated and best explored in therapy, there are some techniques you can use when interacting with someone who engages in passive-aggressive communication.

Recognize the pattern

Passive aggressiveness looks different from person to person, so start by noticing the specific characteristics the person typically engages in. For example, someone may always put down their own ideas after expressing them, while another might agree to things and then silently seethe for long periods of time afterwards.

Don't take the bait

Recognize how you respond to the pattern. Avoid overreacting by becoming frustrated with the lack of real dialogue. To reduce your chances of personalizing or misunderstanding what’s going on, refrain from jumping to conclusions.

Address the issue as soon as possible

The whole point of passive-aggressive behavior is to avoid direct communication, so it can be tempting to leave it alone and not address it.

Use humor

When appropriate, humor can diffuse tense situations and highlight the passive-aggressive behavior at the same time.

Use assertive clear and direct communication

A good rule of thumb is to be as objective and straightforward as possible in these interactions. For professional settings, put agreements, plans, and conversations into writing, and try to have a third-party witness present if possible.

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Have you ever experienced a passive aggressive behavior from someone and how did you manage it?

#Behavior #Aggressiveness #Coping