Loneliness
Hi. I struggle so much with loneliness and it make sme feel sick. I thought 7 cups will help but it's not. I haven't made any friends on here and it's gonna be soon almost a year that I am on this app. It seems like wherever I go I just can't make friends. It hurts. I used to listen to music to feel better about it but now even this doesn't help. What do you use to cope with loneliness? It seems like I am drowning in this loneliness 😭
@23helicopters
Here's my theory- If you can't make friends despite trying, you're either not meeting the right people or not interacting with them in a way that's conducive to friendship. Do you think you have decent social skills? Do you invite people to talk to you later or hope they'll decide to do it on their own?
Hi. Thank you so much for your reply. This means so much! Your questions really made me think and I realized that I actually never even learned how to socialize. I don't wanna tell my whole childhood story but my dad was always so shy!! He barely had any friends and my mom too so they never taught me how to properly socialize. I think I inherited my dad's shyness and I am so uncomfortable in social situations. I rarely go and talk to people first. In fact the only friend I have it's her that came up to talk to me. So yeah, my social skills are lacking. But I have no idea what to do. I can talk to people online but in real life it's so hard!!! When I try it's not working so I guess it's my social skills..
Anyways thank you. Your reply really made me think about it.
@23helicopters
My social skills used to be awful. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, an obsolete term for high-functioning autism. I was always behind my peers socially, but I've learned how to chitchat, carry on a conversation and read people. I have three close friends.
You can probably make similar progress. Right now, your shyness is getting in the way. You can probably become less shy through practice just like how someone can get over a phobia by being exposed to the things they fear. It's healthy to care a little what people think - good people do - but caring too much what people think makes it hard to warm up to them. Talking to new people is a risk you have to take to make friends. I believe you can do it. Best of luck.
@23helicopters 😥😥 gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤ you know what helped me stop the lonliness. I got a therapy pet, he's a cute little bunny. Being around him as made such a difference. Otherwise I'm not sure what to suggest. I'm really worried about you. Lonliness is soooooo hard😞 we are all here for you to help in any way we can ❤
Hi Tinywhisper!!! I'm so happy to see your reply! It means so much to me❤️ I thought about it and I'm going to see some shelters in my area to adopt a cat! I've always wanted a pet! I've never thought about having a bunny as a pet(people around me only have dogs or cats😂) but it must be so cute!!
I'm happy he helped you to feel better.
It's true that Loneliness is hard and it's also very painful. I hope I will get out of here and finally feel better. Thank you so much for replying to me once again❤️ you're such a sweet and kind person. I would love to chat with you more. Is there any way I can message you directly? I don't know if it's possible to message other members directly
It’s tough to make friends here. And that’s not because people here are obnoxious or not friendly. It may be due to the fact that everyone here is struggling with something in their lives. That focus could take center stage and result in the lack of motivation or opportunity for them to want to open up and accept healthy connections. Maybe volunteering or something similar would be more beneficial for you to find friends ❤️
I feel that too. Most of my friends are busy with their life, I have outgrown some of them and I have been busy with my life as well. I really want to connect to people so bad.
i even pushed myself to go to a meetup event (it’s an app called meetup and you can find many groups of people in your area that have social events open for public, if you have certain interest/hobbies you might find people with same interest as well) I’m not the most extroverted person but I realize social events like this / having conversations with new people will make it easier for you to make new friends in the long run. I hope it helps :)