Persevering in love
Two weeks ago, I finally told a friend I have feelings for that I like her. She told me that if appreciates my consistent efforts to show her that I care and that if she wanted to be in a relationship so badly, she would consider me. However, her feelings for me are platonic. She likes me as a person, but she can’t reciprocate my feelings and my efforts. She wants us to take things slow, get to know each other better, and see what happens in the future. Nothing really changed between us after my confession.
I admit that the thought that she might forever be just a dream to me hurts. I really like her. But at the same time, I know that I am not in any way entitled to her affection and that I should respect her feelings.
Despite myself, I would like to give her lots of love and care. I would like to be a friend who supports her and listens to her always. I want to care for her freely. Surely, my dream to be by her side one day still remains. But I can set my feelings of longing aside to fulfill the higher purpose of being a wind beneath her wings.
How can I do so without losing myself and disrespecting her boundaries?
Thank you so much in advance for your insights.
@bluepinkrose Don’t limit yourself to wanting only her attention. You can still enjoy your friendship and it may become very close but may never cross the threshold you’re hoping for. Enjoy it for what it is right now. Also prepare yourself for the possibility that she may find a romantic partner. At that point your relationship with her will change in some way, such as the amount of time and attention she is willing to give you. You can lessen the pain you’ll feel at that time by having prepared yourself for it. Or this may work in reverse, perhaps it will be you who finds someone else, and then you’ll be managing how to maintain this friendship.
