Social anxiety
There's a girl at uni that I really like, but I haven't been able to approach her for a long time. And it's not even about the fear of rejection, I respect it and I'll accept it absolutely fine, it's not the end of the world. The problem is, every time I see her, it's like everything freezes in me. I look at her, my heart starts pounding, I do not know where to look, and in the end I just walk past, convincing myself that next time I will definitely do it. Probably the thing I'm most afraid of is appearing strange or intrusive, especially considering that we've already crossed paths several times and were just passing by-now it seems to me that coming up "suddenly" would look ridiculous and she'd think why I hadn't done it sooner. There is also a constant feeling that I am too ordinary and it will be boring to communicate with me because I have a routine life and do not have any special charisma or "zest". Although my friends speak very coolly about me, they call me empathetic and kind, I don't see this in myself and I'm afraid that if I start communicating, she will see only bad qualities in me. I want to understand how to reverse this state when you seem to realize and understand everything, but at the moment you just stop and can't say a word. How do I approach it so that it's natural, and is it even worth being honest that I just didn't dare to speak for a long time because of my pens? I'm afraid it all looks like some kind of inadequacy from the outside, and if I fail, other people will gossip about it later, although I just want to overcome this barrier and finally get to know each other.
@goldenCircle4661
I would just start off with a smile.
A friendly hello.
Then you'll know her vibe.
Casual.
Chilled.
Not rushing in with anything too pressured and then you can start off with seeing if she wants to be friends first, build from there 💙🤗
@goldenCircle4661 You could always write a compliment on a piece of paper and wish her well for the week or whatever you wish. I always think, why NOT say something? Yes, it's incredibly nerve-racking, but even if nothing happens, at least I let that person know. If you do decide, I would go in with 0 expectations. I was terrified, nervous, and I googled for two weeks on how to give a note to a guy I have a crush on, but once I did it I thought wow I just did something that was way out of my comfort zone. Not only that but it wasn't awkward or regretful because in the end, he accepted what I was handing him, when in the end he had every right to reject or ignore. So I say do it even if its scary.